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f-bomb%20fuck%20bomb%20fucking%20bombing%20sign.jpg Mr. Smith (that’s his name, really) was sentenced to 21 years for six drug offenses. He requested a new trial, fired his lawyer, and represented himself at the hearing on his request for a new trial. Mr. Smith’s “first use of profanity occurred when he used the word ‘fuck,’ apparently for emphasis [Well I never!], in recalling an earlier conversation with his trial counsel who allegedly invited [Smith] to [appeal] based on ineffective assistance of counsel at trial.” The Judge warned him, but damned if it didn’t slip out again. Contempt #1. Six pages of trial transcript later, f-bomb number 2, and Contempt #2. And what do you think Mr. Smith said after the second contempt? “Shit.” Really. The Judge let that one go.

No more bombs for 37 pages of trial transcript. But when it became clear that Mr. Smith was SOL, he interrupted the Judge with “That’s bullshit. That’s bullshit.” The Judge ignored the BS-bombs. Mr. Smith later dropped the B-bomb (bitch), also ignored. But when it came time to sentence Mr. Smith for Contempts 1 & 2, things heated up a little bit.

THE DEFENDANT: What is the maximum on contempt, sir?
THE COURT: What is the maximum on contempt? If I am going to give you in excess of six months, I believe I have to give you a jury trial, is that correct …?
[STATE’S ATTORNEY]: Yes.
……….
THE DEFENDANT: … from day one, you have been prejudiced to the defense …. I am not asking you to believe me. I am only asking to bring forth witnesses in this case who could testify —
THE COURT: I asked you if you had anything you want to say as to what sentence the Court should impose —
THE DEFENDANT: Yeah. You know what? You can give me six more months, motherfucker, for sucking my dick, you punk ass bitch. You should have a white robe on, motherfucker, instead of a black. Fuck you.
THE COURT: I find you in contempt again.
THE DEFENDANT: Fuck you in contempt again.
THE COURT: I find you three times in contempt —
THE DEFENDANT: Fuck you. And fuck.
THE COURT: On each charge, the Court will impose a sentence of five months to run consecutive to each other and consecutive to any sentence you are now serving or obligated to serve.
THE DEFENDANT: Yeah. You better leave now, you, Ku Klux Klan.
THE COURT: The Court will adjourn. [Not so fast, there.]
THE DEFENDANT: Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, fuck you, and fuck you, you, Ku Klux Klan —
(Whereupon, the Proceedings were concluded.)

So what do you think the Maryland Court of Appeals decided – three contempts or one?

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For those of you in the United States who are worried about the steady erosion of privacy rights (count me in), transplant yourself to the United Kingdom for a moment. As reported in The Guardian, here’s a suggestion from Britain’s most senior police forensics expert:

Primary school children should be eligible for the DNA database if they exhibit behaviour indicating they may become criminals in later life.

Gary Pugh, director of forensic sciences at Scotland Yard and the new DNA spokesman for the Association of Chief Police Officers (Acpo), said a debate was needed on how far Britain should go in identifying potential offenders, given that some experts believe it is possible to identify future offending traits in children as young as five.

Five years-old! And if you’re thinking that this could never happen, consider this:

Last week it emerged that the number of 10 to 18-year-olds placed on the DNA database after being arrested will have reached around 1.5 million this time next year. Since 2004 police have had the power to take DNA samples from anyone over the age of 10 who is arrested, regardless of whether they are later charged, convicted, or found to be innocent.

So DNA samples of innocent 10-year-olds are alreadly being collected! And when he reads this, I’ll bet President Bush (yes – he’s a big fan of the Juice – especially the “Get A Life” entries) will be envious beyond words:

Concern over the issue of civil liberties will be further amplified by news yesterday that commuters using Oyster smart cards could have their movements around cities secretly monitored under new counter-terrorism powers being sought by the security services.

Oh, and the Juice is monitoring your activities, too. For example, he knows that, right now, YOU ARE NOT WORKING. GET BACK TO WORK! Here’s The Guardian article
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religous%20book%20text%20scripture%20bible.gif In Kansas (and probably lots of other states), absolutely. By law, the Bible reins supreme, and stands alone. Here’s the text of Kansas statute 19-1906:

Bibles for prisoners; ministers to have access to jail. The sheriff of each county shall provide at the expense of the county for each prisoner under his charge, who may be able and desirous to read a copy of the Bible or New Testament, to be used by such prisoner at proper seasons during his confinement; and any minister of the gospel desiring to aid in reforming the prisoners and instructing them in their moral and religious duties, shall have access to them at seasonable and proper times.

Now I’ve got nothing against the Bible (or the New Testament), but providing it as a basic right? But what about, say, the Old Testament, the Qur’an (Koran), the Talmud, Vedas (Hinduism), the Tripitaka (Buddhism), the Book of Mormon (I’m being open-minded), Dianetics (I’m being very open-minded. I think they’re nuts, but our government accepts them as a religion.) And don’t forget about the right to access to “any minister of the gospel … at seasonable and proper times.”

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drive%20through%20thru%20funny%20weird.jpg Okay, it wasn’t just another day for one Dunkin’ Donuts worker. On that day last month, John Greco, age 46, of Croton-on-Hudson, New York, decided to pick up some coffee at the drive-thru, without any pants on! So when he picked up his order, his toolkit was there for all to see. The ever-vigilant worker got his tag number, leading to Greco’s subsequent arrest for public lewdness. Per the AP report:

Police released a statement Thursday saying it was “unknown how Mr. Greco took his coffee that day.”

Ba-da-bing. Everybody’s a comedian.

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Yes, “right to dry,” not “right to die,” though some people may jump off their condo balconies if, heaven forfend, Project Laundry List, and some New England legislators get their wish. What do they want? Per The Boston Globe:

If successful, the measures in Vermont and Connecticut would be the first in New England, and among the first in the country, to protect the age-old custom of air-drying laundry. (The proposal in New Hampshire died in committee, but proponents say they plan to try again next session.)

And why is this a good idea?

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And that headline is not hyberbole. As reported by the AP:

Law officers in western Kansas are investigating the bizarre case of a woman they say sat on her boyfriend’s toilet for two years.

TWO YEARS! What would you think happens to your body under those circumstances?

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sexual%20predator%20predators%20sex%20crime.jpgA helluva lot. As reported in The Brisbane Times:

Court documents reveal the GP [general practitioner], known only as DAP, began having sex with patients as early as 1987.

He was twice suspended from practicing in 1996 and 2001.

He … faced disciplinary action after admitting to maintaining sexual relationships with at least eight female patients, including the daughter of an elderly woman.

The Brisbane doctor, who cannot be named to protect the identity of his victims, was twice jailed in 2005 for repeatedly sexually abusing his 10 and 11 year-old daughters.

His own daughters too! And after all that, the Health Practitioner’s Tribunal still would not yank his license. Instead, they suspended him for 5 years, concluding that his epilepsy affected his behavior! At long last, Dr. DAP’s rein of terror is over. The Brisbane Supreme Court of Appeal overturned the Tribunal’s suspension and banned this serial sexual predator from ever practicing medicine again. Here’s the source. (And it happens in the U.S. too.)

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pervert%20drawing%20sick%20sex%20stickman.gif I’m having a hard time thinking of anything that compares to what brothers Nicholas and Alexander Grunke were planning on doing. They saw a young lady’s picture with her obituary (I think you have an idea where this is going), and thought she was attractive. So, naturally, they decided to dig her up and have sex with her corpse. Fortunately, things did not go as planned. As reported at investigation.discovery.com,

On the night of Sept. 2, 2006, a concerned citizen called the Grant County Sheriff’s Department and reported a suspicious vehicle that was parked by the St. Charles Cemetery. When Officer Brent McDonald arrived on the scene, he observed Alexander Grunke walking towards the vehicle. According to the criminal complaint, Grunke was sweating profusely and appeared to be nervous.

Oh, and somehow, the brother managed to convince a friend, Dustin Radke, to help them.

“Complainant is informed by Sgt. Kopp’s report that Radke informed him that he had brought Nicholas Grunke to the Cassville Cemetery the first part of the week, that Nick wanted to come down and locate L.T.’s grave, that Nick asked him to help him dig up L.T.’s body so that he could have sexual intercourse with her, that Nick wanted to take her back to a pre-selected location behind his house, that he did assist in digging up L.T.’s gravesite, and that they had stopped at Wal-Mart in Dodgeville on the way down and bought condoms because Nick wanted to use them when he had sex with a corpse,” reads the Sept. 5, 2006 criminal complaint filed by Chief Deputy Jack Johnson.

The charges? Attempted theft and attempted sexual assault. The defense? No sexual assault because the victim was already dead. Did the Judge agree? He did, and his decision was upheld on appeal, but the state appealed that decision to the Wisconsin Supreme Court. Guess how many states have a law that specifically bans necrophilia? Just 16 (and Wisconsin isn’t one of them). You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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police%20car%20chase%20speeding%20fast%20cops.jpg … you happen to be a Montgomery County (Maryland) police officer. I know what you’re thinking – they’re chasing criminals, so it’s okay. That’s true, but only for 76 of the 224 tickets the officers received from speed cameras over the last 8 months of 2007. So, are the officers going to pay the tickets?

The police union says officers shouldn’t pay because the citations are issued to the owner of a vehicle, in this case the county, and not to the driver.

Interesting. What does the police chief think of this argument?

“We are not above the law,” [Police Chief] Manger said. “It is imperative that the police department hold itself to the same standards that we’re holding the public to.” Manger said officers who continue to ignore citations might be disciplined.

I’m with the chief on this one, especially since I just got a #@&%*$%#* ticket from a speeding camera!

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hazing%20haze%20drinking%20college%20fraternity.jpg Nor would you want to be, because many folks have died with lower blood-alcohol levels. Would it surprise you if a fraternity was involved? Or pledges? Five hours of drinking? Me either. Pledges to Beta Theta Pi at Lehigh University in Pennsylvania kicked off the pledging season with a bang. The brothers made sure of that. As reported in The Brown and White, the school’s paper:

After dinner, all members of the pledge class were taken into the party room and offered shots of Old Crow whiskey for about one and a half to two hours. They were then taken into the chapter room and given champagne to drink out of the “loving cup,” which is a ritual at the fraternity, according to a police affidavit.

Shots of whiskey for 1.5 – 2 hours? It’s no wonder, then, that one of the pledges had a blood-alcohol level of .505, more than 6 times the level of legal impairment (.08) in Pennsylvania! Incredibly, the kid didn’t die, though he and another pledge (.31) were in the hospital, unresponsive and breathing through ventilators. (Last year a Rider University student with a .426 blood-alcohol level died.)

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