Squeezed on:

Doctor%20picture%20drawing%20stethoscope.gif
Perhaps this is the case with trauma doctor Martin Derusha, Jr. of Fort Worth, Texas. As to the doctoring, as reported in The Fort Worth Star-Telegram, per Mr. Derusha,

“At this point in my career, I have no malpractice (claims), no problems at all in medicine.”

Maybe in medicine, but …

Squeezed on:

waffle%20house.jpg

Would you rather pay your $7.45 Waffle House tab, or spend the weekend in jail? A 66-year-old Florida woman chose the latter, perhaps because she didn’t have $7.45. Perhaps because she’s ornery. Or maybe she’s mentally ill? Maybe she was lit (she placed her order around 3:45 a.m.). Or maybe some combination of the above … Regardless, per the TCPalm:

O’Neill finished … and then left, telling the Waffle House employee she was going across the street to see a friend but would return shortly.

The Waffle House worker notified authorities after O’Neill, of the 100 block of Maple Street, refused to settle the bill.

When police arrived, an officer told O’Neill to pay up or go to jail.

She then told the officer that she was going across the street to see a friend but would return shortly. Really? No! Here’s what really happened: blockquote> “O’Neill said she was not going to pay for her food,” the report states. “I asked O’Neill again to pay for her food and she plain refused to.”

O’Neill, who faces a defrauding an innkeeper charge, was released Monday from the St. Lucie County Jail on her own recognizance, a jail official said.

I’m thinking “time served.”

Squeezed on:

friday%20funny%20smiley%20face%20sign.gif

Is it just me, or does “Friday” evoke positive thoughts for you too? For most folks, it’s the end of the work week, and the beginning of the weekend. Well sir, an Italian court took a different view of “Friday.” As reported by the BBC News:

Italy’s top court has banned a couple from naming their son Venerdi (Friday), saying such a “ridiculous” name could expose the boy to mockery.

That’s not all, though.

The judges also ordered that the boy be renamed Gregorio – after the saint’s day on which he was born.

What the hell is going on in Italy? Do you think the parent should appeal? This was the appeal!

The Cassation Court upheld earlier rulings by lower courts that Friday was too reminiscent of the name of Robinson Crusoe’s native servant in the classic shipwreck novel.

And what’s up with my Italian brethren?

Gian Ettore Gassani of the Italian Association of Matrimonial Lawyers backed the ruling.

No me gusta. (Yes, I know that’s Spanish.)Here’s the source.

Squeezed on:

bad%20driver%20worst%20car%20wreck%20accident.jpg

If there is a worse driver out there, I’d be shocked. As reported in The Hamilton Spectator, here are some highlights of Toronto resident Gloria O’Neill’s driving history:

Her driver’s licence was suspended as far back as 1978, when she was just 21. In 1984, it was suspended again.

Still forbidden to drive, she got a new licence under a different name.

When that, too, was suspended, she got a third.

In 1995, according to parole documents, O’Neill rolled her car on Highway 401, breaking her back in two places. She was charged in March of that year with driving while under suspension and got 15 days in jail.

Five years ago, after she [ran a red light, and] dragged a pedestrian to his death in a crosswalk, a court banned her from driving for 10 years. [At the time of this hit-and-run, she was driving with TWO suspended licenses, under different names.](She was also convicted of perjury for lying at her bail hearing about her criminal record and multiple licence suspensions.) She only served 9 months for killing this man!

Before you get to angry (#!@*&%!), consider this:

Recently she declined repeated interview requests, saying she has consulted psychiatrists to cope with the trauma of the fatal crash.

“I’m trying to get over it,” O’Neill said when reached by phone. “I have a life and I’m trying to get on with it. I just want to live my life. “

Really? Trying to get over it? By ….

Not longer after that conversation, with five years left on her driving ban, O’Neill got behind the wheel of a Lincoln Town Car registered to her husband, another suspended driver.

On Aug. 28, two Record journalists watched as she drove the shiny red car out of her Toronto parking garage and disappeared down the street.

All told,

[Ms. O’Neill] has been involved in at least 15 collisions, often in rented or borrowed cars.

LOCK HER UP! Oh, and don’t forget about her criminal history, unrelated to driving.

In 1979, under the last name Cloutier, she was sentenced to five years in prison for the beating and robbery of a 62-year-old man while she ran a Toronto brothel. According to media accounts of the trial, while the victim was being entertained by a 16-year-old prostitute, O’Neill and another man robbed him of jewelry, a camera and cash, before beating him so badly he was blinded in one eye.

To read A LOT MORE, click here.

Squeezed on:

shit%20funny%20door%20mat%20doormat%20sign.jpg
The word “shit” is just that – a word. Certainly some folks prefer not to say it, hear it or see it, but, well, tough … Seriously, this is still America, right? Tell that to Brian Barnett, a Green Party candidate in Arkansas. I don’t know anything about his politics, and I will stipulate that his sign was an incredibly stupid way to try to attract voters. (Attention yes, voters no.) But there’s this thing called the First Amendment …

Barnett was ticked off that the Republican (Reeves) and Democrat (Betts) contenders for a state House seat would not debate him. So he was walking around Searcy, Arkansas with a sign that read:

Debate Brian! Chicken shit; 1. Kyle Reeves; 2. Monte Betts.

Squeezed on:

love%20my%20dog%20heart%20good%20man%20best%20friend.jpg

It’s often not pretty when relationships end. But what would these doctors do about the dog they both wanted? From the Bangkok Post:

A woman doctor shot at her boyfriend, who was also a doctor at the same hospital in Ubon Ratchathani province, after he refused to let her take care of their dog after the couple broke up.

Fortunately, the shots missed Supachoke Buddhacharoenlarp and hit his Jeep Cherokee instead. Dr Supachoke told police that he and Napawan Choppradit, 29, had been together for some time, but had decided to separate.

On Thursday, they met to settle matters, but could not agree on who would take care of the dog.

“Dr Napawan wanted to take the dog, but I refused. After arguing for a while, I got in the car, where the dog was being kept. She was angry and shot at us two times,” he said. Dr Napawan has been charged with attempted murder.

Attempted murder! Sweet fancy Moses! I’m thinking this won’t help her in canine custody court …

Squeezed on:

carwash%20sign%20car%20wash.jpg

Seriously, it sucks so much, a Michigan man couldn’t resist. A car wash, a vacuum, an arrest… From The Saginaw News:

Police say a Michigan man has been arrested after “receiving sexual favors from a vacuum” at a car wash.

The Saginaw News reports the 29-year-old Swan Creek Township man was arrested Thursday in Saginaw County’s Thomas Township, about 90 miles northwest of Detroit.

Police Sgt. Gary Breidinger says a resident called to report suspicious activity at the car wash about 6:45 a.m. An officer approached on foot and caught the man in the act. The suspect, whose name wasn’t immediately released, is being held in the Saginaw County Jail.

Posted in:
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

lady%20woman%20gun%20machine%20shooting.jpg

Seriously, he said to shoot her, and she did. The charges? None. Here’s the story from The Denver Post:

Authorities said a woman who shot her husband in the knee won’t face charges because he begged her to do it. The Arapahoe County Sheriff’s office said a 35-year-old woman accused her husband of being drunk and becoming violent during an argument.
She took control of a handgun during the dispute and claimed her husband begged her to shoot him and told her to ‘finish it’ after she fired a shot.

The sheriff’s office said the 34-year-old husband was uncooperative with deputies before he was taken into custody and hospitalized. He was now being held at the Arapahoe County jail after his wife accused him of forcing her into the bathroom and holding a gun to her head before the shooting. He faces charges of felony menacing, third-degree assault and false imprisonment.

Posted in:
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

underwear%20huge%20gigantic%20large%20big.jpg

So maybe that’s not exactly the defense employed, but it’s damn close. As reported in The South Asian Post:

An Indian man escaped a possible death sentence for drug trafficking after his lawyer told a court it was impossible to walk with a stash of heroin in his underpants.Mumbai police alleged Dhirendra Kamdar was carrying two kilograms of the drug in four, 500-gram packets in his underwear when they picked him up as he walked from a guest house to get a taxi to the city’s airport. But when the case came to trial, Kamdar’s lawyer Ayaz Khan said it was impossible for anyone to walk one kilometre with such an amount of drugs concealed in his smalls, the Daily News and Analysis newspaper said.Khan demonstrated his theory to the judge using four identically-sized bags filled with sugar, and was acquitted of the charge on lack of evidence.

500 grams equals about 1.1 pounds. So the total was almost 4.5 pounds. That would definitely alter your gait.

Posted in:
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

cats%20kittens%20cute%20adorable%20funny%20picture.jpg

Why would one think that this young South Carolinian dislikes cats? Per The Post and Courier:

He admitted to killing eight cats — slitting the throats of six kittens and bashing in the skulls of two adult felines.

Brutal. Anything else?

In addition to eight counts of ill-treatment of animals, Campbell faced a harassment charge stemming from threatening telephone calls and profanity-laced e-mails directed at his ex-girlfriend, then 15.

Anything else? Well …

… the ex-girlfriend’s mother, enumerated the horrors her family had observed during nine months they knew Campbell: squirrels killed by the dozens, ducks driven over with a pickup, a cat killed with a shotgun.

The sentence?

After weighing both sides [you can read the entire article – and there’s a lot more – by clicking here], Circuit Judge Markley Dennis imposed a sentence not to exceed five years in the state’s Youthful Offender program on one ill-treatment charge. That included 90 days of boot-camp-style shock incarceration, followed by supervised monitoring.

On a second charge, Dennis handed down five more years of probation to take effect after the Youthful Offender program.

I’d say he got off pretty easy.