Squeezed on:

By

tiolet%20bowl.gif

I would say “only in America,” but this happened in Scotland, pursuant to European human rights laws…. Seems that in some Scottish prisons, for a number of years, the prisoners had to “slop out” (clean out) their own toilets. And? Per the Daily Record:

The slopping-out bonanza began in 2004 when knife-wielding mugger Robert Napier used European human rights law to win a court case against the prison service.

So now Scottish prisoners, and ex-prisoners, are cashing in. As for the title of the post …

A drug dealer used his s2000 compensation payout for “slopping out” in jail to buy heroin to sell to his pals.

The taxpayers’ money allowed scheming junkie Joseph Torano to get a discount on the drugs by buying in bulk.

Here’s how the bust of Mr. Torano went down:

Police raided the house after a tip-off. Hannah Kennedy, prosecuting, said Torano appeared from a bedroom in his underwear and a wrap of heroin fell out of his boxer shorts.

Detectives saw something in his mouth, which turned out to be another package of drugs, and a full body search uncovered a third stash.

And check out the language this Member of Parliament used to describe the situation, which has already cost the Scottish taxpayers millions:

“The SNP Scottish government will end slopping out and clean up the mess these administrations have created.”

Get it? “… clean up the mess …” Brilliant! LAWL. To read more (quite a bit) click here.

By
Posted in: Odd Cases
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

disappear.jpg
About 12 years ago, Ocean City, Maryland resident Richard Brueckner disappeared – right when Richard Thelander was “born.” Now these are just the allegations against Brueckner/Thelander (as reported in The Maryland Coast Dispatch), but it sure doesn’t look real good:

The charges against Brueckner … include about half a dozen cases where he forged his ex-wife’s name to obtain credit cards, which he quickly maxed out to their limits. The amounts ranged from around $5,000 on the low side to as high as $14,000 on another with several different amounts obtained in cash and merchandize on credit cards in between.

He also cleared out several of the couple’s other accounts and holdings, leaving his wife facing bankruptcy and a years-long struggle to clear up the financial mess.

Continue reading →
By
Posted in: Best Of
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

douchebag%20bracelet.jpg

Um, a douchebag. Yeah, I’m sure I wouldn’t be too thrilled if I were featured in a book called “Hot Chicks With Douchebags.” As reported by RadarOnline, Mr. Michael Manelli was pissed enough to file a lawsuit against the publisher and Mr. Jay Louis, the author of the book and the creator of the website www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com, for including him in the book.

The lawsuit includes claims for libel, negligent infliction of emotional distress, intentional infliction of emotional distress, invasion of privacy, and loss of goodwill. Click here for the RadarOnline story, which includes a link to the Complaint filed in Clark County, Nevada.

By
Posted in: Odd Cases
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

doh%20sign%20graffiti.jpg

Not that there is ever a “good” time to commit burglary … But if you’re a burglar by trade, you definitely do not want to break into a house when … it’s filled with police officers! As reported by The Age:

TWO men who broke into a Melton [Australia] house at midnight — while police were already inside carrying out a drug raid. The officers, acting on a tip-off that the house was being used to grow hydroponic cannabis, had just arrested a man in his 20s when the burglars broke in through a side window. When they saw the police, they allegedly attacked the officers before running off. They were arrested a few days later.

By
Posted in: Oops
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

smell%20bad%20feet%20cat.jpg

How can I be so sure? Because, in that bathroom, for several months, was the body of a deceased 90-year-old woman. Seems that Alan Bushey, the leader of a religious group called the Order of the Divine Will (6 members!) told member Tammy Lewis (yes, it was her bathroom), that Ms. Middlesworth (the deceased, and also a sect member) would rise from the dead. In the meantime, Ms. Lewis was cashing Ms. Middlesworth’s Social Security checks! And did I mention that her 12 and 15 year-old kids were living in the house with her?

So what happened to Ms. Lewis? She was facing all kinds of charges, including felonies, but will only have to serve 7 days in jail. Everyone agrees that she was under Mr. Bushey’s spell. I think he’ll be doing considerably more time. Click here to read more (a fair amount).

By
Posted in: Odd Cases
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

orange%20juice%20glass%20fresh%20squeezed.jpg Subscribe by email (scroll down the right-hand side of this page and fill in the box), and you’ll receive the first 1-2 lines of each day’s post. Just click on the link if you want to read the rest of the post.

Squeezed on:

By

snow%20ball%20snowball%20maker.jpg

How appropriate that I stumbled across this law the same day I saw our first snowflakes here in Washington, DC. Now, imagine – if you can – a law that both Bill O’Reilly and Keith Olbermann would agree goes too far. That law outlaws throwing snowballs! And the offending municipality is … Grand Forks, North Dakota. Here’s the law:

9-0123. Throwing rocks, snowballs, and other objects.

(1) It is unlawful for any person to throw or cast, or encourage, aid or assist others in throwing or casting any rock, stone, snowball, or other object into, upon, against, or at any building, structure, automobile street, alley, or other public or private property.

(2) It is unlawful for any person to throw or cast, or encourage, aid or assist others in throwing or casting any rock, stone, snowball, or other object upon or at any person or persons. (Ord. No. 4125, § XIX, 3-20-06)

They have outlawed snowball fights! And even throwing a snowball at ANYTHING! Absurd.

And what about this: you would also technically be breaking the law if you skipped a stone (or a rock!) in a creek. Check it out:

It is unlawful for any person to throw … any rock, stone … into …any … public or private property.

Well done! A beautifully crafted law. Click here (click on Chapter IX, and scroll down to 9-0123) to see this wacky law.

Squeezed on:

By

You may want to consider the case of a man who got into it with Nebraska resident Tango Crenshaw. After the 2 vehicles nearly collided, per the Lincoln Journal Star: The driver of the car yelled at Crenshaw, and Crenshaw argued with him. After the other driver parked in front of Crenshaw’s motor home and confronted him…

Five months after he threw an ax at a car that had nearly collided with his motor home, Tango Crenshaw was sentenced to 37 days in jail for two charges stemming from the incident.

Crenshaw, 51, 718 W. P St., had pleaded no contest to two misdemeanor counts: third-degree assault and criminal mischief. He had originally been charged with second-degree assault and use of a deadly weapon to commit a felony.

Continue reading →
By
Posted in: Uncool
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

fingerprint%20weird%20cool%20interesting%20strange%20funny.jpg

So, Bernard Wood was free on bond for breaking into 2 homes in the same neighborhood on successive days in June. What does he do with his time while out on bond? He returns to that same neighborhood, and breaks into another home! Only this time he left a card with his name on it, saying “I did it.” That’s actually only a slight exaggeration. Here’s what happened, per the Lynchburg, Virginia News & Advance (11/16/08):

“He ate the chicken like it was a cob of corn … And then he just left it there.”

…he washed down [the] chicken with a bottle of orange juice …

It didn’t take much detective work to match his greasy fingerprints on the orange juice bottle to those on file [from the June robberies].

Like the Juice said, might has well have left a note …

By
Posted in: Wacky
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

By

shithead.jpg I could not make this shit up! [Sorry.] A priest in Morganfield, Kentucky is suing Shithead’s owner and the city for allowing the dog to be buried near a veteran’s memorial. It’s not the name that upsets Father Gerald Baker: “What are we saluting? A flagpole with a monument to the dog? It’s offensive. Any Christian, any American should understand why this is offensive.”

Shithead’s owner, Judy Hagan, (an American, and maybe a Christian too!) feels otherwise: “What right does he have to come to this town and put somebody else down for something they have done that he knows nothing about. It’s not a disgrace. I didn’t do it for a disgrace. If that’s the way people wanna take it, then that’s their problem.”

Said Father Baker: “This woman in her arrogance and her ignorance, demanding she has the right do this? Well we’ll just see.” Yes, we will. You’d think this just happened, right? Nope. Shithead was laid to rest, with the city’s permission, in 1999. You can read more in a FirstCoastNews.com article here.

Continue reading →
By
Posted in: Best Of
Squeezed on:
Updated: