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Colorado bus driver Jim Moffett is a hero, regardless of what the State Patrol thinks. As reported by the Rocky Mountain News:

Two elderly women exited the bus and tried to walk across Federal to their trailer home on the east side, Moffett’s stepson Ken McDonald said Tuesday.

“With that light snowstorm, my stepdad didn’t think they could cross the street safely,” McDonald said. “So he got off the bus with another passenger, and they helped the ladies cross.”

The four people had made it about halfway across Federal, and most of the northbound traffic had slowed to let them go the rest of the way, McDonald said.

“But one pickup driver got impatient and passed in the left- hand turn lane,” McDonald said. “He plowed right into my stepdad – but not before (my stepdad) pushed the old ladies and the other guy out of the way.”

Not only did Mr. Moffett prevent the elderly ladies [and a passenger who was helping out] from being injured or killed, he did so at his own expense.

Moffett is at St. Anthony Central Medical Center with bleeding in the brain, broken bones in his face, a dislocated shoulder, a broken wrist and possible ruptured spleen and liver.

For his trouble, Moffett got a jaywalking ticket!

Ryan Sullivan, of the State Patrol, said that while Moffett’s “intentions were good,” jaywalking caused the accident.

Think maybe those “good intentions” would cancel out the jaywalking ticket? Discretion? Compassion? Anyone? Bueller?

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Oh no you didn’t just cite Ludacris, federal Judge Terence T. Evans. Okay, maybe “cite” is a little misleading, but still … from footnote 1 in U.S. v. Murphy

The trial transcript quotes Ms. Hayden as saying Murphy called her a snitch bitch “hoe.” A “hoe,” of course, is a tool used for weeding and gardening. We think the court reporter, unfamiliar with rap music (perhaps thankfully so), misunderstood Hayden’s response. We have taken the liberty of changing “hoe” to “ho,” a staple of rap music vernacular as, for example, when Ludacris raps “You doin’ ho activities with ho tendencies.”

I like it. Here’s the full cite (with a link to the case): U.S. v. Murphy, 406 F.3d 857 (7th Cir. 2005).

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Certainly all relationships have their ups and downs, but this is ridiculous. Chalie Simon, a 19-year-old sophomore at the University of Colorado, and her ex-boyfriend had, according to him, broken up about 20 times over the course of a year!

I’m guessing that he broke up the 20th time, and here’s why, as reported by The Boulder Daily Camera:

Cmdr. Tim McGraw said Simon … went to her former love interest’s apartment in the early morning hours and began throwing rocks at his window.

When the man opened the door for her and offered to let her come in from the cold, she allegedly became irate and tried to make her way into the man’s bedroom [where there was another woman], McGraw said.

After several attempts to remove her from the apartment, the woman allegedly grabbed the man’s genitals and “squeezed hard,” McGraw said.

Ouch!!!!!! thought the males reading this. BFD, thought the females. The police?

[Ms. Simon] was arrested and booked into the Boulder County Jail on suspicion of third-degree assault, domestic violence and first-degree criminal trespass.

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Perhaps there is one such family. It involves something that has probably never happened before, nor is it likely to ever happen again. On the same day, the New York Commission on Judicial Conduct found that two brothers should be removed from the bench. The North Country Gazette identified the brothers as follows:

Joseph S. Alessandro, a Justice of the Supreme Court, Westchester County, sits in Goshen and Francis M. Alessandro, a Judge of the New York City Civil Court,sits in Bronx County.

Both matters involve dishonesty. You can read the decision on Joseph Alessandro here, and Francis Alessandro here. Each man has 30 days to appeal.

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I think it’s safe to say that virtually everyone has heard the expression “doesn’t know his ass from a hole in the ground.” With that in mind, here’s an excerpt below from a Florida disciplinary case against Dr. G.K. Dwarka Nath:

37. The pathology report for the “colonoscopy” biopsy found benign squamous mucosa … The finding was inconsistent with tissue from the rectum or colon, but consistent with tissue from the vagina. It became clear that Respondent had scoped the vagina and not the rectum.

Incredibly, he didn’t even know that the scope was inserted in the wrong place! Sadly, the disciplinary complaint also describes the case of another patient who did not receive the appropriate care, and died. And what of Dr. Nath? He was fined $10,000 and put on supervised probation! Here’s a link to the Final Order with the above language. There’s another action on the disciplinary board’s website indicating that he was put on probation on 2/23/09, but that Order has not been posted.

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english%20Judge.jpg Let’s say you are Sheikh Khalid Ben Abdfullah Rashid Alfawaz, you’re rich, and you’re getting a divorce in an English court. During a Hearing, here are some of the judge’s comments:

That the sheikh could choose “to depart on his flying carpet” to escape paying costs.

That the sheikh should be available to attend hearings “at this relatively fast-free time of the year.”

That he should be in court so that “every grain of sand is sifted.”

And the sheikh’s evidence was “a bit gelatinous . . . like Turkish Delight.”

What a card! The Sheikh was not amused. He asked the judge to recuse himself due to bias. When the judge refused, the Sheikh appealed and … won. He was booted from the case, and had to apologize. Not to worry, though. Lord Justice Ward threw him a bone.

No little part of my embarrassment comes from my belief that the injection of a little humour lightens the load of high emotion that so often attends litigation and I am the very last judge to criticise laughter in court. For my part I am totally convinced that [the judge’s] jokes were not meant to be racist and I unreservedly acquit the judge of any suggestion they were so intended.

Shazam! Next time I do something stupid, I want Lord Ward speaking on my behalf!

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What do you do to a guy who feels bad for a trapped animal frying in the sun (with no food or water) so he moves the cage? You arrest him, of course. No worries, though. Read on (from UPI):

Charges were dropped Thursday against a Utah man who moved a city-owned skunk trap into the shade because he felt sorry for the animal inside.

Paul Roberts, a lawyer for South Salt Lake City, said after 90 minutes of testimony that the case should be dismissed, The Salt Lake Tribune reported. Ryan Turner told the court he moved the trap because the skunk had been caught in it for two days, with no food or water and the sun blazing down during the day.

“I don’t see any crime in helping an animal,” Roberts said.

Turner had asked for a trap around his property because of a skunk problem. A city employee said Turner complained the skunk had invaded the house at least twice by a cat door.

The case attracted a lot of attention with Gene Baierschmidt of the Utah Humane Society calling Turner a “hero” who “made the morally right choice.” Turner said he found it “baffling” that it proceeded as far as it did.

I see your “baffling” and raise you an “idiotic” and a “WTF.”

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Since the Juice is against school dress codes, how do you think he feels about “hair” codes? Check this out, from The Hindu (the “Online edition of India’s National Newspaper”):

In a bizarre incident, a teacher snipped off the hair of five students in a school in Burdwan district of West Bengal for allegedly not adhering to the institute’s code of conduct related to hairdo.

The teacher, Manisha Ray, cut short the hair of the students for violating the rule of tying two plaits and coming with with a single plait during the morning prayers. As news of the incident spread, irate guardians entered the school premises in protest. They locked the teachers in a room and demanded Ms. Ray’s suspension. The police arrested Ms. Ray following complaints by the guardians of the students whose hair was cut off.

“We have arrested the teacher, based on a complaint. Charges against her will be framed under relevant sections of the Indian Penal Code,” Burdwan’s Additional Superintendent of Police Utpal Naskar said.

Members of the school’s managing committee later suspended Ms. Ray indefinitely from service.

Paws (and scissors) off the hair.

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doll.jpg As reported by the Associated Press:

A man was arrested after a government agent allegedly found him in an office building restroom lying next to an inflatable, anatomically correct doll with his pants down.

Seems he’s got a thing for mannequins, too.

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