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Even for those who believe in Karma, The Juice doubts you think it’s this instantaneous. How instantaneous? Check out this dude who tried to skip out on his bar tab, as reported by www.phillyburbs.com:

Police said the man, who may be from Honduras, was asked to leave the Sandbar [in New Hope, Pennsylvania] shortly after 6 p.m. Saturday. He was handed his bill and asked to pay, but after receiving the bill ran out the back door, police said. He fled across Waterloo Street and somehow fell over a wall onto water covered rocks below.

The man, whose name was not released Saturday night, was pulled from an area of the shoreline not easily accessible from above by a team of firefighters aboard a rescue boat. He was brought to shore and taken to St. Mary Medical Center in Middletown.

Do you believe?

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Hmmm. The Juice was working on this post and thought this name sounded familiar, so he checked the archives of 1,854 Legal Juice posts and found this one about Judge Willie F. Singletary. The story on philly.com was now not so surprising.

The state Supreme Court yesterday canned Philadelphia Traffic Court Judge Willie F. Singletary, suspending him without pay after he allegedly showed a woman cellphone pictures of his genitalia two weeks ago.

Yikes.

But this isn’t the first time Singletary has made headlines. In 2007 his driver’s license was suspended for unpaid tickets [a BOATLOAD of them – see Juice post above], and two years later he was reprimanded for promising favors in exchange for campaign donations.

That’s quite a record in just the past 5 years.

Yesterday, the Supreme Court ordered that Singletary be “relieved of any and all judicial and administrative responsibilities as a judge of the Philadelphia Traffic Court.”

Might consider another line of work.

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Is it just me, or does “Friday” evoke positive thoughts for you too? For most folks, it’s the end of the work week, and the beginning of the weekend. Well sir, an Italian court took a different view of “Friday.” As reported by the BBC News:

Italy’s top court has banned a couple from naming their son Venerdi (Friday), saying such a “ridiculous” name could expose the boy to mockery.

That’s not all, though.

The judges also ordered that the boy be renamed Gregorio – after the saint’s day on which he was born.

What the hell is going on in Italy? Do you think the parent should appeal? This was the appeal!

The Cassation Court upheld earlier rulings by lower courts that Friday was too reminiscent of the name of Robinson Crusoe’s native servant in the classic shipwreck novel.

And what’s up with my Italian brethren?

Gian Ettore Gassani of the Italian Association of Matrimonial Lawyers backed the ruling.

Not cool. Here’s the source.

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We’re not talking about texting here. We’re talking about kissing. As reported by the Arab Times:

Police [in Kuwait City] have arrested an unidentified couple for committing immoral act inside a car.
It has been reported a police patrol was passing by and saw the couple in an embrace. They were kissing each other and were not even aware that a police patrol was driving in their direction.

Kissing! Oh the humanity!

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You can never be sure how someone is going to handle being insulted. No doubt this gent’s insulting days are over. As reported in The Daily Herald (Everett, Washington), according to court papers:

[Dallas Amber] Smith [18] and others were gathered at her ex-boyfriend’s home south of Monroe, watching a movie and drinking.

She boasted to party-goers that she was good at doing back flips and that she could do one off anything, court papers said.

A man, 19, challenged her to do a flip off the deck. Smith took off her shoes and attempted the maneuver. She couldn’t do it. That’s when the man laughed at her and told her that her feet smelled, [deputy prosecutor] Albert wrote.

Smith started to playfully wrestle with the man, rubbing her socks in his face. She started hitting him. After several seconds, he pushed her away, Albert wrote.

It’s a little weird, right? Check this out.

She grabbed her coat, picked up a steak knife and headed for the door. On the way, Smith walked up to the man and stabbed him in the back, court papers said.

The man and others called 911. A sheriff’s deputy found the man sitting on porch with the knife sticking out of his back, the blade buried a few inches in. His lung had collapsed from the stabbing.

Sticking out of his back! Someone is a wee bit oversensitive. The prognosis?

The man is expected to recover from the injury.

Whew. What did Ms. Smith have to say for her feet … er, herself?

Police arrested Smith at her parents’ home. She denied knowing about any stabbing and declined to speak with investigators.

Perhaps it’s a little late for the denial …

A witness told police that Smith came to his house that night and told him that she had hurt someone and she was in trouble. She told him someone had taunted her.

Doh! Here’s the source.

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So the cops caught these guys with a cell phone they had already thrown away? How’s that possible? Well, as reported by the Volusia County [Florida] Sheriff’s Office:

A 66-year-old woman had gone to the store Saturday afternoon and when she returned to her Saxon Boulevard home she discovered that someone had smashed a back window and gotten inside. When deputies responded, jewelry, a laptop computer and a cell phone were discovered missing. The victim used a cell phone locator service to get the general area the phone was in.

How did the police get from the “general area” of the phone to the perps?

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Tired of the same old billboards? You wouldn’t be, if you were in Sweden. Some Swedish legislators were upset by mobile billboard ads for strip joints. Per The Local:

“It’s degrading to continually be confronted with cars whose main purpose is to drive around Stockholm’s streets in the evenings – with naked women as the focal point – serving as advertisements for strip clubs,” wrote Sylvia Lindgren and Veronica Palm ….

“Motor-borne advertisements for strip clubs are definitely not in line with an egalitarian view of people. It’s a degrading view of women and sends the wrong signals, especially to children, young people, tourists, and others who find themselves in the public spaces of our streets and city squares.”

So they “introduced a motion that would have required permits for vehicles used to tow billboards through city streets.” What do you think? Did it pass? Nope. And …

As a result, Stockholm’s strip clubs are free to continue sending trucks and trailers rolling down the city’s streets featuring scantily clad women in seductive poses in an attempt to lure customers to their clubs.

The floodgates are open! Look for more scantily clad women, and an uptick in car accidents …

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Most drunk people give themselves away. It’s only a questions of whether or not anyone takes note. Fortunately for this lady’s 3 kids, someone took note, and called the cops. What was the first indication that she overindulged? She was driving down the road at 10 mph with her right front tire out of air. Oh, and she was weaving. And just in case that’s not enough evidence, as reported by www.cleveland.com, here’s what the woman said when the cops pulled her over:

“I need to put gas in my tire.”

Case closed. (Can you believe she failed field sobriety tests?) Here’s the source.

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If this dude decides to remain in the relationship, he would be well-advised to have a pack of cigarettes on hand at all times, and be willing to share them. As reported by The Morning Call (Allentown):

Bethlehem police said a woman went on a rampage Monday night when her boyfriend denied her a cigarette and attacked him with a steak knife.

Linda Sellers, 55, is charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, simple assault, reckless endangerment, terroristic threats, harassment and possessing an instrument of crime. Sellers, of 714 Hayes St., is in Northampton County Prison under $750,000 bail.

Yikes. Here’s the official police version:

Officers were called to the home for a report of a woman yelling. Sellers answered the door and said, “Oh, good. It’s the (expletive) police!”

Police said Sellers pointed to Camilleri, who was sitting on the couch holding a steak knife he had wrestled away from her, and told the officer she was going to kill him.

Camilleri told police he was sleeping on the couch when Sellers awoke him and asked for a cigarette. When he told her to buy her own, police said Sellers threw items around the apartment and overturned a glass coffee table.

Sellers went into the kitchen, grabbed a steak knife and attacked Camilleri, police said. He suffered three cuts on the top of his head and was treated and released from St. Luke’s Hospital-Fountain Hill, police said.

Here’s the source.

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Of all the reasons to fire somebody, this has got to be among the most idiotic. As reported by China Daily:

Two women have been fired from their jobs for refusing to drink at a company party.

No doubt they would have been fired had they gotten shitfaced. Maybe each employee should get a breathalyzer, along with guidelines for the acceptable BAC range…

He, an executive manager of an auto parts company in Hanyang, and her assistant refused to drink alcohol when their boss made a toast at their company’s New Year party.

They were fired the next day on grounds of incompetence.

“This is not fair at all,” He, who joined the company just a month back, fumed after receiving her termination letter.