Articles Posted in Yikes

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Clearly this lady is not cut out to be a school bus driver. Why? Well, as reported by The Herald-Tribune (Sarasota, Florida) …

A school bus driver has been fired for defecating on school grounds and encouraging a student to drop his pants and “moon” other students through the bus window.

Maureen Butler, 50, also reportedly admitted to district investigators that high-school students threw condoms and tampons on her bus that were found later by elementary school children.

A fine example for the youngsters. You can read a fair amount more here. And yes, she was fired.

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The Juice has learned that William Congreve is the source of this oft-quoted passage:

Heav’n has no Rage, like Love to Hatred turn’d,

Nor Hell a Fury, like a Woman scorn’d.

Suffice it to say that Mr. Congreve had not met a man such as this fellow:

An inebriated man bit off his ex-girlfriend’s ear at a restaurant in Chifeng, the Inner Mongolia autonomous region, last week.

The man has been arrested.

Days after the woman broke up with him, the man invited her for dinner at a restaurant and begged her to return to him.

When she refused, he pounced on her and bit off one of her ears.

The ear was only found the next morning, which was too late for doctors to fix it back.

An ear for an ear? This story was reported by the North News (China).

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Not sure how The Juice missed this one last week. One thing’s for sure – this gent wishes he’d missed. Yes, that’s cryptic. Here’s some clarification, as reported by NewsOn6.Com?

Police were called to Southwest Medical Center on Saturday, July 14, after a man came into the emergency room with a gunshot wound. Police questioned Tavares Donnell Colbert and told them he was on his way to sell a gun when he accidentally shot himself.

According to Colbert, he was on his way to S.E. 44th and Shields when he pulled over to the check the gun. He said he’d had problems with it earlier and wanted to make sure it was functioning properly.

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Who doesn’t like horses? You can start with this Nebraska lady, at least when it comes to police horses. As reported by omaha.com:

Three police officers and a horse were needed to take a 20-year-old Omaha woman into custody early Sunday in the Old Market after she intervened in a traffic stop.

Officer Jacob Bettin, a police spokesman, said the three officers all sustained minor injuries including scratches, cuts and bite marks during the incident. The woman was booked into jail for resisting arrest, three counts of assaulting an officer and one count of assaulting a police service animal.

Bettin said the incident began about 1:20 a.m. when the woman approached an officer who had made a traffic stop near 10th and Harney Streets. The woman, who was not part of the traffic stop, approached the officer and became “verbally and physically combative,” he said.

Two other officers, including one on patrol service horse Gunny, arrived to help place the woman under arrest.

Yikes. Here’s the source.

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What could possibly have been going through this attorney’s mind in the lead-up to this bizarre, just plain gross in a really weird way, action? As reported by HawaiiNewsNow:

A Kauai attorney was convicted of harassment Thursday after being accused of licking his client’s ear at his office last year.

First reaction: Eww!

The 26 year-old complaining witness said in court that she was in the Lihue office of attorney Lawrence McCreery July 26, 2011 discussing her child custody case when the incident occurred.

She said McCreery, who was licensed to practice law in Hawaii in 1975, touched her arm and said, “You look so good,” and, “Too bad you’re married.” The witness said McCreery made a “weird sound” and then hugged her tightly and licked the back of her right ear.

As for Mr. McCreery:

McCreery took the stand Thursday to deny the charges. He testified that the complaining witness initiated the hug and he denied licking her ear.

McCreery’s defense attorney, Michael Soong, argued that it would be physically difficult for the incident to have occurred as reported by the witness.

Uh-huh.

Deputy Prosecuting Attorney Lance Kobashigawa told the court that all elements of the harassment law were proved and that there was no mistake that what the complaining witness felt on her ear that day was McCreery licking her.

You know what the judge concluded. Here’s what he said:

Per Diem Fifth Circuit District Court Judge Frank Rothschild said there was no evidence that the complaining witness had any motive to make up the story or to lie.

The judge added that defense claims early in the trial that the defense would dispute the complaining witness’s credibility never materialized.

“Quite frankly,” said the judge, “these are the actions of a dirty old man.”

Ouch. That has got to hurt, your reputation, and a whole lot more. But wait – it’s not over yet.

McCreery’s attorney told the court that he would be appealing the decision.

Yeah, that’s a good idea. Keep the story alive, when you have virtually no chance of prevailing. Here’s the source.

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Okay, so you’re boyfriend won’t let you drive his car. Good decision, since you were drunk. So then you decide to “borrow” his brother’s car. Want to guess what his brother does for a living? As reported by The Northwest Florida Daily News:

A 26-year-old woman was arrested Wednesday night after stealing a Walton County Sheriff’s Office patrol vehicle.

Britney Michelle Simpson of Warner Robbins, Ga.,and her boyfriend were staying with his brother, an investigator with the Sheriff’s Office, according to a press release.

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Let’s say you are in Akron, Ohio, you’re gay, and you see someone you’re interested in, who you think is interested in you. Well, you better be sure. Why? Check out this Akron ordinance:

133.04 – Importuning

… B. No person shall solicit a person of the same sex to engage in sexual activity with the offender, when the offender knows the solicitation is offensive to the other person, or is reckless in that regard.

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You do know that when you fire a bullet in the air, it will land somewhere, right? One man in particular is keenly aware of this. As reported by the Pinellas County (Florida) Sheriff’s Office:

According to reports, [Richard John] Smeraldo, his wife and friends were watching the fireworks display near the Safety Harbor Spa and Marina when something struck him in the face. He told deputies that he first thought he had been struck by a rock. But one of his friends found a bullet on the blanket next to her – and then Smeraldo realized he had been struck by the bullet.

Yikes.

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You treat any woman like this, let alone a pregnant one, you ought’a lose more than your fingertip. As reported by the Hillsborough County (Florida) Sheriff’s Office:

On July 2, 2012 at approximately 5:50 p.m. at 14519 Hensel Lane, Apt. 118 the defendant and victim got into a verbal argument that turned physical when the defendant armed himself with a kitchen knife, pointed it at the victim and refused to allow her to leave the bathroom by blocking the doorway with his body. The defendant proceeded to push the victim and punch her in the face with a closed hand. The victim fought back in self defense and the fight continued to the bedroom where the defendant put a small dresser in front of the closed bedroom door not allowing the victim to leave. The defendant then grabbed the victim by the neck with one hand pushing her up against the wall and punching her in the face. The victim bit the defendants’ finger in self defense. The victim never lost consciousness and sustained a laceration to her forehead, as well as contusions. The defendant had the tip of his middle finger on his right hand bitten off. The victim and defendant have been girlfriend and boyfriend for 5 years and have a child in common and the victim is pregnant. The defendant is aware that the victim is pregnant.

The victim was transported to Florida Hospital.

And the defendant? Remember, this is a direct quote from the Sheriff’s Office’s News Release:

The defendant and the tip of his finger were taken to Tampa General Hospital. He was then transported to the Orient Road Jail.

“The defendant and the tip of his finger …” So, did the tip of his finger also make the trip to jail, or was it just him? Here’s the source, including a mug shot.

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Warning: this is truly disgusting. If you try and think of a product you could buy at CVS, and then return, that would be really, really disgusting, you would NOT think of this. As reported by the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office:

Investigation revealed the individual was frequenting the CVS since March 2012 and began returning the product in April 2012. He would purchase a pack of enemas and return them at a later time. According CVS personnel, the items appeared to be unused and therefore the store would put the box of enemas back on the shelf for resale.

Enemas! Back on the shelf! “Appeared” to be unused …

On Tuesday, June 5, 2012, a CVS employee thought it was strange that the same individual was making returns with the same product. The employee decided to check the box of enemas after it was returned. Upon opening the box, the employee observed all the enemas (6) had been used and the box had been resealed so it would appear to be unopened. An employee then checked the additional three boxes on the shelf and determined they had all been previously used.

Why does one man need so many enemas? Anyway …

On Tuesday, June 12, 2012 at 10:19 a.m., the same unknown individual attempted to return another box of enemas that were purchased at 8:12 p.m. on Wednesday, June 11, 2012. The employee advised the individual that he could no longer take returns for these items. The employee contacted his loss prevention manager and advised all the area CVS stores about this incident.

Oh it’s on now, enema man.

On Wednesday, June 13, 2012 a CVS employee thought he observed the customer’s vehicle, obtained the tag number and contacted the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office.

On Thursday, June 14, 2012 the JSO was contacted by CVS with information to help identify the suspect. CVS personnel were able to determine that the suspect purchased enemas on one occurrence with a credit card. That transaction, as well as other purchases at the store, and the tag number led police to a possible suspect.

But how would they be sure they had their man? Do you really want to know?

Samples were taken of the fluid in the enema bottles and have been sent to the Florida Department of Health for testing. Fecal matter was located on some of the returned enema bottles. The fecal matter has been collected as evidence and submitted to the Florida Department of Law Enforcement (FDLE) for testing.

You were warned.

The individual has been identified, and was arrested on an unrelated outstanding warrant. The investigation continues.

Here’s the source.