Articles Posted in Wacky

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It’s a little strange to call 911 on yourself. It’s even stranger if you’re doing it because …

“Basically I slapped him this morning because he wouldn’t have sex with me, and he hasn’t had sex with me in a couple of months, so I slapped him across the face and he wants me to go to jail,” reported the caller.

So why did this South Carolina woman call the cops?

She also told officers her husband was going to call the police, so she would do it for him, according to the report.

But before you take me to jail …

The wife then told the dispatcher she was going to change clothes and get ready for the police to arrive, because she didn’t want to go to jail in a sweatshirt and a pair of boxer shorts she was wearing at the time.

What did the husband have to say?

The husband claimed she never hit him and she just wanted to go to the J. Reuben Long Detention Center.

Quite the interesting family. The source is WMBF News. Click here for more.

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These women knew that they were virtually untouchable by the police. Why? Because they were pregnant (or suckling)! Per the Qianjiang Evening News (via ChinaDaily):

A group of 46 pregnant women were arrested and prosecuted for theft in Hangzhou, Zhejiang province.

The women, who committed more than 400 thefts a month in the city, vary in ages from 20 to 40. They repeatedly got pregnant, because police will not usually arrest pregnant women or women suckling. One member in the group even got pregnant eight times in 10 years.

After they were arrested, the number of robberies in the city decreased noticeably.

If you know of a stranger gang, The Juice is all ears.

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Some people smoke weed. Some people believe god tells them to do things. Therefore, some people who smoke weed believe god tells them to do things. No? Of course not. You need not have taken formal logic to know that is complete BS. Nevertheless, there was a young man in West Hartford, who, after smoking weed said he was doing god’s work… As reported by The Hartford Courant:

Police said a Middle Road resident arrived home Sunday and noticed the front door had been kicked in. [Levon T.]Sarkisyan [27], who identified himself as Leon Sark, then walked out the front door and told the homeowner “a light from above told him to do this,” said Farmington police Sgt. Stephen Egan.

Sarkisyan then told the homeowner he’d broken into the house because “God wants me to help the world,” Egan said. He then told the homeowner, “I mean you no harm.”

While in the house, Sarkisyan used a fireplace poker to smash statues, including one of a Roman soldier, and a marble table, causing about $10,000 in damage, Egan said. Sarkisyan also rummaged through closets, took a shower, then dressed in the clothing of a deceased former resident, Egan said.

No harm to you, just your house and your stuff.

The homeowner told Sarkisyan to sit down, then fumbled with a phone trying to call 911, Egan said.

Sarkisyan said, “You see, God will not let you use the phone,” Egan said.

Er, um, okay.

As they waited for police, the homeowner asked Sarkisyan how he broke into the home.

Sakisyan then stood up, “flexed his arm and said, “you see, super human strength,” Egan said.

Officers arrived moments later and took him into custody without incident.

Why, Sark, why?

Later, Sarkisyan told officers he’d smoked “a strange strand of herb” that caused him to do what he did, Egan said.

The charges?

… third-degree burglary and first-degree criminal mischief …

Sark clearly has problems, but lack of an education is not one of them. He graduated from UConn. Click here for the source, which includes one of the wackiest mug shots The Juice has seen in a while.

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If you don’t follow Legal Juice on Twitter (@LegalJuice), the bird gets it. And, you heard it here, rumor has it that Mr. Wile E. Coyote is ending his longstanding relationship with Acme for “a more reliable supplier.” When asked if maybe he’s the problem, not the equipment, Mr. Coyote maintained his characteristic silence.

And don’t forget to like Legal Juice on Facebook.

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You can allege anything. The question is, can you prove it? Check out the allegations in a lawsuit currently pending in Fairfax County (Virginia) Circuit Court, as reported in The Washington Post:

Paragraph 10. “At the time of the collision, Defendant was going 85 miles per hour.”

Paragraph 12. “At the time of the collision, Defendant was having sex with a female.”

Paragraph13. “At the time of the collision, Defendant was driving admittedly drunk.”

Paragraph 14. “At the time of the accident, Defendant was partially or totally in the backseat of the car.”

So those are the allegations. Said the defendant’s lawyer …

… there was “no statement by anyone that they were driving on the Beltway having sex” and “no facts on it.”

The Post also reports that …

Records show the defendant, from Woodbridge, was convicted in Fairfax district court of drunken driving near Telegraph Road in May 2010. But now he denies he was driving. (What?) He was coming from his 21st birthday party in Baltimore, court records state. The woman involved has been dismissed from the case. There was someone ELSE in the car too, and HE denies driving as well.

Should be quite the trial. (It’ll take place next week.) Here’s the source.

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Remember The Juice’s post 2 days ago about the epic thermostat battle between 2 sisters? Well, this post involves 2 brothers who got into it over a bottle of shampoo! As reported by The Sheboygan Press:

Two brothers were charged Monday with disorderly conduct for fighting over a bottle of shampoo, according to a criminal complaint.

Jonathan R. Pippert, 32, and Jared J. Pippert, 27, came to blows Sunday at their home at 2728 S. 10th St., where both live with their mother. Jonathan Pippert faces up to two years behind bars due to prior offenses, while his brother face a maximum of 90 days.

2 years! Shazam!

According to a criminal complaint: Police called for a reported disturbance found Jonathan Pippert was on the lawn swearing at his mother. He and his brother both had scrapes and bruises throughout their upper bodies.

Both brothers said the fight began when Jonathan Pippert went into his brother’s bedroom and took a bottle of shampoo while Jared Pippert was in bed. Each claimed the other attacked him, forcing him to defend himself.

The Juice’s call: offsetting fouls. Dismissed!

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In probably every household, there is disagreement regarding the desirable thermostat temperature. In almost every household, a compromise is reached. In this household, not so much. These sisters, who share a home, got into it over one degree. As reported by The Chicago Tribune:

Ilona Sales and Wanda Lupina both say they ended up bruised in the tussle sparked when Sales turned the heat up to 68 degrees.

Lupina turned the heat down one degree, to 67, and that’s when the trouble started …

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You did NOT just pull a gun on the clerk for that amount of money. As reported by The Chicago Tribune:

A Cook County judge set bail at $50,000 today for a man charged with displaying a handgun to a convenience store clerk who refused to give him 99 cents.

According to court records, Christopher Tisley, 34, walked into a convenience store in the 2800 block of West Lawrence Avenue in the Ravenswood neighborhood around 3 a.m. Saturday and demanded the money. When the clerk refused, he displayed a gun.

Tisley, of the 5800 block of South Morgan Street, exited the store after a customer walked in, allowing the clerk to lock the door. Tisley then returned and repeatedly pounded on the windows of the store, court records state.

He returned to the store! But not for long …

Police were notified and arrested Tisley a block away. The gun Tisley allegedly displayed was not recovered, but prosecutors say police found 3 grams of methamphetamine in his possession.

Tisley is charged with aggravated assault and possession of a controlled substance.

Here’s the source, including a mug shot.

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Before you jump all over 19-year-old Calvin Morett [not pictured above – that dude is a “model”], remember that you were once 19 too. It seems Mr. Morett was not content to throw his cap in the air. Instead, he came to graduation dressed as a 6-foot penis, and sprayed students and school administrators with silly string (per The Albany Times Union). It didn’t go over well. He was apprehended when he tripped on his, um, costume. He was charged with, and pleaded guilty to, disorderly conduct. The punishment for this “crime?” Three apologies (one of which will be published in the local paper), $95 in court costs, and 24 hours community service. What did Mr. Morett have to say for himself?

… he recently told a local television station that he thought the prank was worth whatever punishment he would face because he made people happy.

The Juice is most definitely a fan.

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So 55-year-old Wyoming resident David Anthony Vaughn was enjoying “Iron Man” at the Eastridge Movies when the unthinkable occurred – the projector malfunctioned. Noooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!! When Mr. Vaughan demanded a refund, he was offered a voucher to see another movie. Maybe a later showing of “Iron Man?” Anyway, as reported in the Casper Star-Tribune:

According to witnesses, Vaughn became agitated as theater employees tried to explain their policy to him, yelling at workers and telling other patrons they were being ripped off. One customer heard him say that he was going to get his money’s worth before he ripped a computer monitor from the ticket counter and threw it through the glass door. After breaking the glass, the monitor came to rest by a table in the mall food court.

Shazam! Makes you wonder what he would do when faced with a serious injustice (real or perceived). Surely when the police arrived, Mr. Vaughan realized that, perhaps, he had overreacted?

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