Articles Posted in Wacky

Tru dat.

Irish dockworker Denis McKenna must really love his sister. He was always making the ultimate sacrifice of missing work to take her to the doctor. Only one problem – he was seen wearing a “golf jumper” when he was supposed to be taking his sister to the doctor. So a private investigator was hired. A few months later, McKenna told his supervisor he had to take his sister to the doctor. The next morning, another boss was waiting outside McKenna’s home when he saw him … put his golf clubs in the trunk and take off.

This fellow followed McKenna to the club, approached him on the second tee, and told hm to enjoy his game. Now, having been caught, McKenna must have gone back to work, right? Nope. His car was still in the club’s parking lot at 3:00! So the next day, he was fired. (This wasn’t the first time McKenna missed work to “look after his sister,” and his boss and co-workers were tired of it.)

So McKenna was canned the next day. And he fought it. And he … won! Why? Because he said his sister had indeed been set to go to the doctor’s, but changed her mind! [Okay, so he couldn’t have gone to work in the morning, once his sister “changed her mind?”] And the tribunal said the company failed to provide McKenna with an appeal against his dismissal. For his troubles, McKenna was awarded €1,000 ($2,100 US)!

…deal crack! A 79-year-old New York man was arrested and charged with possessing and selling crack cocaine out of his apartment. As reported at WNYT.com, Charles Ritchie “is part of a mid-level drug ring with clients spanning Southern Albany and Greene Counties. The operation has been going on, report police, for at least two years.” What does Ritchie say? “I don’t deal.” What do the neighbors say? “He’s such a nice, quiet man …” No, not this time. Said neighbor Stephen Pelletier:

People coming in and out at like 2:00, 3:00 o’clock in the morning. I get up and go to work at 4:00 in the morning. There was people in and out all the time at that time.

For more (just a bit), click here.

… to atone for stoning 2 dogs to death, then hanging them! Read more here.

So the government spent £650 ($1,365 US) on fingerprint analysis just to show that a 16-year-old had handled a stolen Cornetto ice cream. Yes, that’s “handled,” not “stolen.” What’s the punishment for handling stolen ice cream? A conditional discharge (meaning the Cornetto Kid just has to stay out of “trouble” for a little while.) Wow. That was worthwhile.

And what about the 15-year-old who was prosecuted for writing his name on a community center wall with a Twix bar? After he was arrested, processed, interviewed, and hired a lawyer, the case was dismissed after the court was told that it was indeed a chocolate bar the boy used, not a pen. “A Twix bar you say? They’re delicious. Case dismissed.” [Okay, it didn’t go exactly like that, but the case was dismissed.] You can read more (not much) here.

In England, in Paul Kavanagh’s case, 15,000! He’s been at it since 1995. On one day in February of this year, he made 65 calls! After all these years, how did they catch a guy who used unregistered cell phones? He gave the police a huge clue when he told one of his victims that he “liked the way [her] hair is today.” And, as reported in the Sunday Metro, he often called a gym that he had a clear view of from his home. Why did he get 2 1/2 years? Said the Judge:

It seems to me to simply have been the case that the defendant was taking drink and cocaine and making these calls for the purposes of sexual gratification and I must say to my mind for the purposes of cruelty.

For more (just a bit) click here.

Holy Shit! No, actually, the name of the Canadian band is “Holy Fuck.” The band, featured on this month’s cover of the magazine “Exclaim,” was told by the venue Coachella that their gig was canceled because of their name.

Funny thing though. Holy Fuck played there before! And remember, Canada has much more relaxed laws and attitudes about “bad words” than the U.S. The Toronto band Fucked Up performed live on MTV Canada, although they were introduced as “Effed Up.” According to the MTV Live producer, you can’t even say “effed” on MTV in the U.S. Some other groups making the rounds: Total Fucking Destruction (their CD is available in Wal-Mart, really), Fucked Up, Fuck the Facts, Fuck, and Fucking Wrath.

In response to an Associated Press poll which found that 67 percent of the respondents were bothered “a lot” by hearing swear words, Fucking Wrath drummer John Cerar replied:

“Who cares? We’re a metal band. If someone has a problem with it, fuck it.”

To read a whole lot more on this, click here.

In Florida, a minor can’t be prosecuted for having sex with another minor. So if you are the 16-year-old girl and the 17-year-old boy who engaged in “sexual behavior” (it’s not described beyond that), you won’t get in trouble, right? Wrong! And you won’t believe what they got busted for.

It all started when they took digital photographs of themselves engaging in “sexual behavior.” They then sent the photographs from the girl’s computer to the boy’s e-mail account. They didn’t show the photographs to anyone. Still wondering why they got busted? For violating Florida’s child pornography law! And they are the “children!” Per Cnet news.com:

Each was charged with producing, directing or promoting a photograph featuring the sexual conduct of a child. Based on the contents of his e-mail account, the boy was charged with an extra count of possession of child pornography.

Were they convicted? She pleaded “no contest,” and he was convicted. They both appealed and … lost, 2-1! Click here for the source of this story,and more information, including excerpts from the majority opinion and the dissent.

“Why me?” the 64-year New York homeowner had to be thinking after burglar Luis Hidalgo broke into his home and bit his ear off! So badly that it couldn’t be reattached! And Hidalgo punched and kicked the homeowner, and whacked him in the head with a karaoke machine. Okay, so why this house? Mr. policeman?

“This guy just randomly picked this house,” said Sgt. Anthony Repalone, a police spokesman. “There were no proceeds and there’s no connection between the victim and the subject. Obviously, his behavior was such that there may have been some drug involvement.”

Ya think?

This is eerily similar to a recent Juice post, though with a much less compelling rationale, and no bags of poop. How would you like to return to your home on a Sunday morning and find some dude passed out on your couch? In his underwear? Having raided your refrigerator? A couple in Pierson, Florida was not too pleased. So they woke the dude up, and he went right back to sleep! When a cop came – he still couldn’t get the dude up! Two more cops came and took him to jail, where he is being held on $5,000 bail.