Articles Posted in Uncool

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Paul Ewing was certainly a stand-up guy to admit killing his neighbor’s plants with Roundup (in what has to be a unique way – see below). But was it really necessary to tell the police why he was mad at his neighbor? From The Bradenton Herald:

To get back at his neighbor for owing him money, Paul Ewing resorted to a series of drive-bys toting a water gun filled with Roundup weed killer, the Bradenton Police Department reports.

He told investigators that he was upset because his neighbor owed him more than $200 for drugs.

Brilliant!

The 35-year-old, who lives in the 100 block of 10th Street West, confessed to his actions after he was pulled over Thursday for driving with a suspended license.

In the front yard, Ewing gunned down flowers and bushes, the report stated. To get to the plants in the backyard, he filled water balloons with the weed killer and tossed them onto his neighbors property. Ewing estimated the landscaping damage to be about $250.

The Bradenton Police Department had been investigating the incidents that began May 1 and lasted until July 1.

Ewing was released from Manatee County jail Thursday after posting a $500 bond. He has been charged with criminal mischief with property damage.

Here’s the source.

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Except for Rich Sanchez (see photo above and video below), nobody wants to get tased. But how far would you go to avoid it? Hopefully there is not another soul out there who would go to this length. As reported by The Macomb Daily:

A judge in Mount Clemens has sentenced a father to a year in jail and parenting classes after he used his 2-year-old daughter as a shield during a confrontation with a Taser-wielding police officer.

27-year-old Joseph Cox of Belleville … pleaded no contest to misdemeanor child abuse and guilty to home invasion and obstructing an officer.

He was accused in March of breaking into his ex-wife’s Warren home. The child was held in front of a Taser pointed at Cox by an officer. The officer didn’t fire.

Clearly, Mr. Cox is no Rick Sanchez.

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Here’s a tasering you probably remember …

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There’s nothing wrong with grown men liking toys, be they iPhones, sports cars, or … plastic action figures … A man in Japan was perhaps a little too attached to his toys, based on what he did when his mommy threw some of them away. As reported in the Japan Times:

A man charged with torching his home in Kasai, Hyogo Prefecture, admitted Tuesday he did it out of anger because his mother threw away some of his plastic figures from the “Gundam” animation franchise.

Oh, they were “Gundam” action figures? Now it all makes sense!

“Plastic figures of Gundam are like my life partners. I thought I would rather burn to death with them than have them thrown away,” said Yoshifumi Takabe, 30, who pleaded guilty as his trial began at the Kobe District Court. Nobody was injured in the blaze [although his mom was in the house!].

Takabe told the court he piled 200 to 300 boxes of Gundam plastic figures up to near the ceiling in his room.

Very uncool, especially since his little brother, mother and grandmother also lived in the 2-story house he torched . Here’s the source.

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The Juice is of course referring to Elmo. For you Elmo fans, no worries. It turns out Elmo can take care of himself, and then some. As reported by the Orlando Sentinel:

Police in Winter Park said a man dressed as Elmo was attacked at a local music store on Saturday afternoon by a man who believed the Sesame Street character was a threat to him.

According to Winter Park police Lt. Wayne Farrell, the man had been hired to wear the Elmo suit for an event at Winter Park Village, and was on his break when the attack occurred at the Guitar Center on Orlando Avenue at about 3 p.m.

“He just wandered into the Guitar Center to look at instruments,” Farrell said. That’s when police say a man, who they said felt “threatened” by the Sesame Street star, attacked.

“He immediately thought (the man dressed as Elmo) was a threat,” Farrell said. Farrell called the ensuing struggle a “very physical fight,” with multiple punches thrown.

Who won?

“Elmo got the best of the guy,” Farrell said. “He broke two of his fingers.”

Adding insult to injury …

Police took the assailant to a local hospital, where Farrell said he will be temporarily detained for mental health evaluation.

Here’s the source.

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There’s an old saying:”If it seems too good to be true, it is.” There’s another old saying: “There’s an exception to every rule.” Here’s an exception, as reported by Reuters:

Standing in the aptly chosen “Frohsinnstrasse” (“Cheerfulness Street”) in the town of Aschaffenburg, the unnamed pensioner wore a sign around his neck explaining his philanthropy: “I am not unemployed or homeless. I have a wife. I am well. That’s why I’d like to give you a euro.”

A passer-by who feared the pensioner was running a scam alerted police, who were surprised at the man’s explanation that he merely wanted to share his happiness at retiring.

[Note: The passer-by also enjoys hunting golden-egg-laying geese.]

After explaining himself, the pensioner was allowed to continue his generous retirement celebrations, because after all there’s no law against giving away your own money to passing strangers, according to local police.

Really? There’s no law against just giving money away money? Shocking. Here’s the source.

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Oh no you didn’t just taze my 86-year-old granny. They did, at least that’s one of the allegations in a Complaint recently filed in federal court in Oklahoma by Lona Varner and her grandson Lonnie Tinsley against the City of El Reno, Oklahoma and a few of its police officers. Here are some of the allegations from the Complaint:

On or about December 22, 2009 the plaintiff Lona M. Varner was in her apartment at 1955 S. Shepard Ave, Apt. 703, El Reno, Oklahoma, in her hospital-type bed. She was also connected to a portable oxygen concentrator with a long hose.

Yes, granny was in bed, on oxygen … Enter Lonnie:

A severe winter storm was moving into the area and Ms. Varner’s grandson, LonnieD. Tinsley, came to the apartment to check on her at the request of his father, now deceased; because Lona Varner is 86 years-old and in marginal health, she takes several prescribed medications daily; Lonnie’s grandmother was unable to tell him exactly when she had taken her meds, he was concerned and called 911 to ask for an emergency medical technician to come to her apartment to evaluate her.

911, so here comes an ambulance, EMTs …. Nope.

As many as ten El Reno police … came to the apartment and pushed their way through the door.

Ms. Varner told them to get out of her apartment. Instead, the apparent leader of the police (Duran) instructed another policeman to “Taser her!” He stated in his report that the 86 year-old plaintiff“took a more aggressive posture in her bed,” and that he was fearful for his safety and the safety of others.

Really, can you make this stuff up? No doubt the officers involved will make that case.

Lonnie Tinsley told them, “Don’t taze my Granny!” to which they responded that they would taser him; instead, they pulled him out of her apartment, took him down to the floor,handcuffed him and placed him in the back of a police car.

The police then proceeded to approach Ms. Varner in her bed and stepped on heroxygen hose until she began to suffer oxygen deprivation.

The police then fired a taser at her and only one wire struck her, in the left arm; thepolice then fired a second taser, striking her to the right and left of the midline of her upper chest and applied high voltage, causing burns to her chest, extreme pain and to pass out.

Sweet Mary. If these allegations are true, The Juice can think of some tasering that ought to be done.

The police then grabbed Ms. Varner by her forearms and jerked hands together,causing her soft flesh to tear and bleed on her bed; they then handcuffed her.

What about Lonnie?

The police freed Lonnie Tinsley from his incarceration in the back of the police carand permitted him to accompany the ambulance with his grandmother.

Lona Varner was transported by paramedics to Parkland Hospital in El Reno wherethe burns to her chest and the torn flesh on her arms were treated.

Ms. Varner was transported in the early morning hours of December 23, 2009 fromParkland to St. Anthony’s Hospital in Oklahoma City where she was placed in the psychiatric wardat the direction of the El Reno police; she was held there for six days and released.

Wow! What a bizarre case. Thanks to The Bike Lawyer, Steve Magas (www.OhioBikeLawyer.com) for bringing this to The Juice’s attention via Courthouse News.

Here’s the entire Complaint on www.courthousenews.com.

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What would you do if you had a sweet tooth, but no cashish to satisfy it? Hopefully not what this gent in Louisiana did. As reported by The Advocate:

The suspected “Brownie Bandit,” a burglar with a sweet tooth, was arrested after a more-than-two-week run pilfering a Gonzales bakery of its stocks of sugary baked goods and other treats, police said.

Officers caught Jamon J. Simoneaux, 18, 2228 S. Burnside Ave., Lot No. 133, Gonzales, inside Jumonville’s Bakery after business hours Thursday with a bag full of chocolate-frosted brownies, the Police Department reported in a news release Friday.

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Lots of people don’t like cats. Probably 99.99% of those people just ignore them. But not this woman. Fortunately, the cat’s owner had a security camera that caught the whole thing on video. Per The Courier Mail:

The bespectacled, grey-haired woman, who appears to be in her 50s, was filmed about 8pm local time Saturday walking along Stephanie and Darryl Mann’s street in Coventry.

In the recording, the woman spots the Manns’ four-year-old rescue cat Lola and strokes it tenderly before suddenly grabbing her by the scruff of the neck and calmly dumping her in a rubbish bin before closing the lid and walking away.

How do you do that? Let’s hope she doesn’t have kids… You can see the video by clicking here or on YouTube by clicking here (the woman enters at about 24 seconds). And what about the cat?

The couple found Lola some 15 hours later when they heard the cat meowing in the bin. Lola has since recovered from the ordeal.

Cruella remains at large.

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This may actually be the first case of “arm-wrestling rage.” And this was some serious rage. As reported by The Sun Sentinel:

According to the arrest report, Erick Lee Blanton was visiting a home in the 400 block of Sunrise Drive early Sunday morning when he challenged another man to an arm-wrestling contest and lost. The winner of the match told officers that Blanton then became upset [a gross understatement].

Blanton left the house, got in a red pickup, and allegedly drove it across the lawn and over a mailbox, trying to hit bystanders.

Certainly uncool, but then …

Witnesses told police Blanton also put the barrel of a rifle against the forehead of his erstwhile arm-wrestling opponent.

Yikes. Time to coin a new saying: “If you can’t beat ’em, at least scare the crap out of ’em.” The charges?

…four counts of aggravated assault with a motor vehicle and one count of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon…

Anger management issues?

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Have you ever had to go to the bathroom so badly that you couldn’t make it from the bar to the bathroom? Yeah, neither has The Juice. One Adolfo Mosmann would answer differently. Or, if he could make it to the bathroom, he decided not to make the trip. As succinctly stated by the sorority girls in Animal House, ewwwwww! Per The Orlando Sentinel …

Adolfo Mosmann, 24, who is from Brazil and in the U.S. on a student visa, was arrested about 1:15 a.m. Monday.

An off-duty Orange County Sheriff’s Office deputy who was working security at the [House of Blues] in the 1400 block of East Buena Vista Drive noted in an incident report that Mosmann was caught urinating in the cups and placing them on the bar, where other people were drinking, even though bathroom facilities were nearby.

The security guy must have been … pissed.

[Mr. Mosmann] was thrown out of the club about 11:45 p.m. Sunday and told not to return, documents show.

And of course a guy who urinates in cups at the bar is going to do as he is told …

An employee and another witness later saw Mosmann return to the club in Downtown Disney Westside. He was wearing a different shirt.

A different shirt? Brilliant!

Mosmann, who has a Jacksonville address, was described in an Orange County sheriff’s report as “intoxicated.”

He then was arrested on a trespassing charge.

Sadly, this bender may cost Mr. Mosmann A LOT. Why?

Rosters show that Mosmann has played soccer on college teams at Jackson Community College in Michigan and University of South Florida.

It is unclear whether his student visa is in danger because of his arrest.

“While I cannot comment on the specifics of this case, convictions for some criminal offenses can result in the revocation of student visas,” said Dani Bennett, a spokeswoman for U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement. “If a student visa is revoked, the individual may request reconsideration of the revocation.”

Where is he now? Free on a $500 bond, and hopefully taking a break from the bar scene.