Articles Posted in Say What?

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These gents only wish they had the opportunity to grill under the influence. Alas, their plan was foiled by Johnny Law. As reported by tcpalm.com:

Police officers were fairly certain they had recovered a stolen gas barbecue grill when they saw two intoxicated men pushing it up the road late one night this week.

You’d have to drunk to think that wouldn’t look suspicious.

The officers couldn’t immediately connect to the grill to its home. However, police used a crime website called Uneighbors.com to send out an alert about the recovered grill and heard back from its owner within a day.

Drunk people often make bad choices, followed by more bad choices …

The series of events started Monday when two North Carolina men on foot in the 3700 block of Mockingbird Lane stole the grill from a home, police said. About 10:50 p.m., a patrolman saw the men pushing the grill in the 500 block of Fiddlewood Road. Jacob Cecelski, 19, of Carolina Beach, N.C., and Riley Brenner, 20, of Wilmington, N.C., wouldn’t give the officer straight answers about where the grill came from and also gave him false names, police said.

Both were charged with misdemeanors for disorderly intoxication and giving false names while detained. They eventually admitted to stealing the grill, but couldn’t remember which house, police said.

Here’s the source, with mug shots.

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Surgery is scary enough. I’d like to know that my doctor is certain that operating while on crack would be a bad thing. It’s not that California ear, nose and throat specialist Li Quang Nguyen actually operated while on crack, but check this out, as reported by the OC Register:

In July 2007, Dr. Nguyen was staying at the Howard Johnson Express in Huntington Beach. Police responded to a call that maids could not enter the locked room for cleaning. Police found Nguyen in a deep sleep. Police removed rock cocaine, a clear vial of liquid cocaine, a glass pipe and a lighter, the documents say.

Hard to say “what crack” in those circumstances, right?

Nguyen admitted to police that he had freebased cocaine the day before but said he was not “hooked,” according to the documents. In April, he pleaded no contest to drug charges and was ordered to enter an 18-month treatment program.

Okay. Looking good, until the disciplinary hearing for his medical license…

… during his hearing, Nguyen said he knew nothing about the drugs and “went so far as to testify that he did not know if it would be dangerous to perform surgery under the influence of cocaine.”

The board’s disciplinary documents say, “He claimed he could not know if this would be dangerous since he had never tried it, but such an assertion made by a trained physician is simply preposterous and rather frightening.”

What, what, what? Dr. Nguyen, who had a previous disciplinary action, had his license revoked. To read more, click here.

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Please, tell The Juice that this Connecticut legislator did not just push the button to talk and say that. Alas, he did. As reported by the The New London Day:

State Rep. Ernest Hewett, D-New London, was removed from his post as deputy speaker this week after making an inappropriate remark to a teenager testifying during a committee hearing.

Go on.

During a Feb. 20 Appropriations Committee hearing, a female 17-year-old ambassador for the Connecticut Science Center asked the committee to continue funding the center’s ambassador program.

During her speech, she said the program helped her overcome her shyness and get over her fear of snakes.

“I am usually a very shy person, and now I am more outgoing,” she told the committee. “I was able to teach those children about certain things like snakes that we have and the turtles that we have. … I want to do something toward that, working with children when I get older.”

Near the end of her speech, committee co-chairman state Rep. Toni Walker, D-New Haven, smiled at the girl and made a comment about how the teen was no longer shy.

All this talk about snakes, you can probably see where this is going.

Hewett, 56, recalled Thursday that he then pushed his microphone button to talk and said, “If you are shy, then I have a live snake under this desk.”

Wildly inappropriate does not begin to do justice to this colossally idiotic, insensitive remark.

According to an audiotape of the hearing, Hewett said: “If you’re bashful I got a snake sitting under my desk here.”

“What I meant to say was, if you are shy then I have an acre of land in the Everglades,” he said Thursday.

Did the spin work? Nope.

A spokesman for the Democratic caucus, Gabe Rosenberg, said that in reaction to the comment, Hewett has been stripped of his deputy speaker title. He will lose $6,446 from his salary, which means he will make the base legislative salary of $28,000, according to a legislative document.

And because of the incident, legislators who have not been through a sexual harassment training recently will have to take a refresher course, Rosenberg said. Freshman and sophomore legislators recently underwent training, he said.

You can read more (a fair amount) here.

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Admit it. You’ve thought about it. Some jackass steals your parking spot. You want blood (or at least some bruising). But you don’t do anything because … it’s a parking spot. Well, one or both of these gents felt otherwise, per timesonline.com (Beaver, PA):

[Franklin] Township police said officers were initially called around 6:40 p.m. Monday to the Giant Eagle parking lot for a report of a pedestrian being struck by a car, but then learned the incident was actually a man who had been assaulted.

Police said two men got into an argument over a parking spot, and one man assaulted the other. The man who was assaulted went to Ellwood City Hospital to be evaluated, but police said they did not believe he suffered any serious injuries.

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The gent says he just wanted to talk with the preacher. Well sir, it is alleged that a little more than that happened one day back in February 2012, as reported by knoxnews.com:

Andrew Byrd filed a lawsuit Feb. 15 in Sevier County against the Rev. Joel Arwood, his wife Theresa Arwood and deacon Charles Shields, all of Sevierville, as well as the Family Chapel Church of God and the Church of God International.

So what happened?

According to the lawsuit, Shields and the Arwoods asked Byrd on Feb. 21, 2012, to attend a meeting at Family Chapel Church of God, 1038 Charlotte’s Court in Pigeon Forge. During the meeting, Theresa Arwood said Byrd had a “demon or spirit that needed to be cast out,” according to the lawsuit.

“Thereafter, Joel Arwood and Charles Shields physically assaulted (Byrd) , while being encouraged by the shouts of Theresa Arwood,” Byrd states in the lawsuit.

According to a Sevier County Sheriff’s Office report, Byrd suffered a broken tooth, bruising and lacerations to the face, and pain and lasting injury to his back and leg.

Yikes.

Byrd alleges the pastor later bragged to the congregation that he had “punched the devil and knocked the devil’s tooth out.”

Byrd alleges in the lawsuit that Joel Arwood then “published” allegations accusing Byrd of murdering three people in Sevier County, including a 16-year-old girl, and having a contract to kill two more people, knowing that the statements were false.

Should be one helluva trial. Here’s the source.

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You’ve probably heard someone say that TV is like a drug. Well, this story certainly bolsters that notion. Per the Northwest Florida Daily News:

Natasha Lynn Head, a 34-year-old Fort Walton Beach woman, was charged with aggravated assault with a deadly weapon after she picked up a knife and told the victim he was going to leave “in a body bag,” according to her Fort Walton Beach Police Department arrest report.

Yes, the fight started over a remote control!

She and the victim had been arguing over the television remote control, which he hid from her so she could not watch television in the bedroom, according to the report.

The victim said Head charged at him with the knife, which caused him to hide in the bathroom and call 911, the report said.

Her defense?

Head told police she never intended to harm the victim and only got the knife so she could break into the bathroom and get the remote.

What? Like you’ve never used a knife to open a door? Here’s the source, mug shot and all.

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On Valentine’s Day, this is how you treat your fiancee? The Juice hopes they did not put any wedding-related deposits down. From The Union Leader:

Gary Cormier, 41, of 515 Hall St., is accused of first threatening his fiancee on Valentine’s Day and, after being released on bail, stalking her.

Yikes.

Cormier is accused of jumping out in front of the woman’s vehicle on Hall Street and pounding on the hood and when she put the vehicle in reverse, opening the door and trying to pull her out, scaring her.

After his release on bail, he is accused of returning to the Hall Street address. Police prosecutors then filed a motion to revoke Cormier’s bail on the first charge. “Because I went home,” Cormier said.

Cormier will be held without bail until a hearing Tuesday in Circuit Court, Manchester District Division.

To Mr. Cormier’s credit …

At his arraignment Friday in Circuit Court, Cormier said: “I’d like to pleady guilty and get it over with.” Told each charge carries a sentence of up to one year, Cormier said: “If I go to jail for a year, I go to jail.”

To the judge’s credit …

The judge refused to accept a guilty plea, telling Cormier he needs to talk to a lawyer. Cormier agreed and trial was set for March 21.

You’ll find the source here.

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Apparently this woman is not familiar with the scientifically proven theorem that “The third time’s the charm.” As reported by The Belleville News-Democrat in the Police Blotter:

Attempted armed robbery — Circle K, 3801 North Belt West. An employee reported that while working on paperwork at the counter, a person wearing a cap and a scarf covering her face approached the counter with a handgun. The person ordered the employee to open a safe but he could not open it. She ordered the victim a second time and again he advised it could not be opened. The suspect fled the area on foot.

Doh! The Juice is just glad nobody was hurt.

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The Juice really doesn’t know where to start with this Maryland law, so here it is:

A person may not sell or offer for sale a contraceptive device, whether or not advertised as a prophylactic, by means of a vending machine or other automatic device at a kindergarten, nursery school …

So, that means no “condom” slot in the soda machine? How will the teachers cavort safely? Maryland, what have you done? Click here to read the statute.

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Okay, The Juice ran out of material, so he just flat-out made this up. Ha! No, loyal readers, sadly this is a true story. From The Toronto Star, we have this story of a tremendous waste of government resources.

On a Monday evening in October 2011, 62-year-old Kathryn David returned to her home near Mt. Pleasant Rd. and Eglinton Ave. She pulled into the shared driveway between her home and that of her neighbour, Kevin Cooper. According to the judge’s decision, she got out of her car to move Cooper’s hose that went along the side of Cooper’s house and under a tall wooden gate to the backyard. Eventually, she tugged on the hose, causing it to catch on a patio chair in Cooper’s backyard and tear.

No big thing, you might think? What if The Juice told you this, this awful act was caught on videotape? Right, still no big thing, or … was it?

The incident was caught on video surveillance cameras set up by Cooper and he called the police to report property damage. David was then handcuffed and taken to a police station in the back of police car, says her lawyer, Erec Rolfe.

What? Why?

That is standard procedure, says Toronto Police spokesperson Victor Kwong, adding that “if the public wants us to be police and not be judge and jury, we go ahead with the charge regardless of dollar amount. And then it’s up to the courts to decide whether to mediate this or go to trial with it.”

The Juice isn’t blaming the cops, just the geniuses who set up this ridiculous, overly-inclusive procedure.

“The criminal charges were laid against our neighbour following a detailed police investigation and an independent decision by the Crown prosecutor to pursue those charges,” said Cooper and his wife Sylvia by email late Tuesday night.

So what happened?

“Fortunately for the Toronto Police Service, the Supreme Court of Canada has said that stupidity in relation to the law and negligence is not a case for malicious prosecution.” said Provincial Court Justice William Wolski before dismissing the charge, according to a transcript. “Why these charges were laid is still a mystery to me.”

Next case! Here’s the source, including a photo of the scene of the crime.