Articles Posted in Say What?

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fish
Sure thing dude. My house is your house! No, the homeowner wouldn’t have said that, because she had no idea who the guy was! As reported by The Salina Journal (salina.com):

A burglar apparently got a case of the munchies after breaking into a house in the 700 block of North Seventh Street on Tuesday afternoon, and — possibly even more bizarre — he argued with the occupant and refused to leave once she returned home.

Capt. Mike Sweeney said Luella Garrett, 52, returned to her home about 3:10 p.m. to find a stranger sitting on her couch. She called 911 to report the incident, telling the dispatcher that the man refused to leave, Sweeney said.

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gun handgun shot shooting
First this man gets shot just for going to church? (So he wasn’t exactly just “going to church.”) Then, he gets busted for being in a Burger King? (So it was a little after closing?) As reported by khou.com:

A man [who] was shot and wounded by a church pastor last week after allegedly breaking into a Baytown church is now accused of breaking into a Burger King.

Lee Marvin Blue, 27, was shot in the right shoulder and taken to Memorial Hermann Hospital. Police say that after his surgery, Blue walked out of the hospital.

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ice cream truck
Is it just me, or does it seem like there are a lot of strange ice cream truck driver stories? Here’s another one, as reported by wivb.com:

Last Friday night may have seemed like the prime time for dessert, but those who frequented an ice cream truck in Clarence [New York] met a rude surprise.

Officials say the driver of the truck acted belligerently by yelling at kids, but that wasn’t all parents had to complain about. Police say the driver drove while wearing nothing but his underwear.

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doughnuts
People say the darnedest things! Take this New Jersey gent. (Too late – the cops already did.) As reported by NJ Advance Media for nj.com:

A township man caught with cocaine and a loaded handgun tried to explain away the powder on his face by telling police that he had just eaten a doughnut, authorities said Wednesday.

Police pulled over the Jeep Grand Cherokee that 30-year-old Octavio Delasuaree was driving after it cut off their patrol car Sunday night on Route 23, according to Capt. Laurence Martin.

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red car
The fact that someone stole this car kind of makes you wonder what the other choices were. As reported by The Indepedent Record (Helena, Montana):

The Lewis and Clark County Sheriff’s Office is seeking information on a 2003 Red Dodge Neon, which was reported stolen Thursday at 4:07 p.m.

“The car was taken between 8:30 a.m. and 3 p.m. yesterday,” said Sgt. Brian Robinson. The four-door passenger car, with license plate 5-08162A, has tinted windows, damage to the rear bumper and custom black and chrome wheels.

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OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

As crimes go, this could have been a lot worse. In fact, it’s $5 away from not being a crime at all.  As reported by The Highline Times (Burien, Washington):

When the pastor of Highline United Methodist Church arrived to their location in north Burien on February 25th, she called 911 and let police know that she believed someone had broken into the church. She told police that she saw someone and heard footsteps though no one, other than herself, was scheduled to be there for work at the time. When she called out to whomever might be in the building, she heard them flee the building. Police arrived at the church a short time later and found that the only thing that was taken from the church was an estimated $5 worth of chocolate from the kitchen. Police found no damage to the building and nothing else missing.

Whew!

 

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trash cans
Trust me, your trash isn’t that interesting. As reported by The Seattle Post-Intelligencer:

Seattle’s privacy is in the trash, according to eight people suing the city over its composting ordinance.

A lawsuit filed today in King County Superior Court argues that Seattle’s composting ordinance violates constitutional privacy by allowing garbage collectors to sift through peoples’ trash without a warrant.

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duel
The most important rule regarding any form of communication is thus: “Would I mind if this was out there for the whole world to see?” Well, in retrospect, I think this fellow would mind. As reported by patch.com:

A Crystal Lake lawyer mocked the size of a client’s penis and challenged him to a duel, according to a complaint filed by the Illinois Attorney Registration & Disciplinary Commission.

Attorney Donald Franz called client Mike Rutkowski a “small penis a——e” and “insulted Rutkowsky’s manhood and choice of automobiles,” the complaint said.

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Two Girls hiding behind Straw Bale in Field
You rob a bank and you get away. Of course you wouldn’t go to any of your known haunts, or … would you? As reported by NJ Advance Media for NJ.com:

Within hours of publicizing photos from bank surveillance after a TD Bank robbery, more than a dozen tipsters recognized a 30-year-old Lakehurst man and contacted the police.

So they id’d him, but where was he? Funny you should ask …

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