Articles Posted in Oops

Think this guy is drunk? You’ll know for sure at 45 seconds.

Hey, look out for that … lamppost. As reported by the BBC:

CCTV has captured the moment when two handcuffed prisoners’ attempt to escape custody came to a crashing end as they ran into a lamppost.

The pair ran away while awaiting their court hearing in Hastings and managed to cross a street towards a car park before they were recaptured.

Got the gun? Check. Ready to do this? Check. In the bank? Um. No. Per the Lexington Herald-Leader:

Police in Nicholasville say a man showed a gun and tried to rob a bank, but he wasn’t in one.

The Jessamine South Elkhorn Water District has offices in what was formerly a branch of Farmers Bank.

City police spokesman Scott Harvey told the Lexington Herald-Leader a man came into the building Tuesday, showed a pistol and demanded money.

When an employee told the man the office really didn’t have any money, the confused would-be robber replied, “I know you have money. It’s a bank.”

He was told it was no longer a bank and he left with nothing.

If they catch the dude, just imagine the ribbing he’ll get in jail …

Let’s say you rob somebody, and then you’re foolish enough to call him the following day to taunt him. Would you do it from a phone that could be traced to you? A young man in New York did. And it led to his arrest, along with his 4 alleged accomplices. As reported in New York’s “The Journal News” …

[Lt.] Clark said the incident occurred Tuesday, when the victim, who works at the Scarsdale Public Library, left work about 9 p.m. to catch a bus home. About 20 minutes later, as he waited at the Post and Olmsted roads bus stop, he was attacked by a group of young men who police said beat him until he momentarily blacked out. They fled in a car after taking the man’s briefcase.

Knocking the dude out? That’s cold. Why’d they do it?

“The investigation revealed that this was a completely random attack, and that these young men set out to beat somebody up,” Clark said. “Taking the briefcase was almost incidental. One of the men said that his mother had died recently, and that he was angry and just wanted to beat someone up.”

Really? I didn’t know random asskicking was one of the 5 stages of grief. Just how did the bust go down?

The next day, [the victim] received the taunting phone call, which he immediately reported to police. Within hours, Scarsdale Detectives Russ Morvant and Servando Rodriguez were able to trace the call to a house on North Kensico Avenue in White Plains. They found Marzano, of 100 N. Kensico Ave., there, along with Pacicca, of 1649 Hall Ave., and Brown.

Find anything else?

The detectives also found the stolen briefcase and other items belonging to the victim …

Doh!

You would think that even a petty thief would be mindful of the the old adage about “going to the well once to often.” Not this guy. As reported by the Australian publication The Age:

A serial beer bandit who was caught after stealing beer on three separate occasions from the same house. Wendouree man Leigh John Parkes first stole beer and some loose change in January after seeing a carton of lager in an open garage. Parkes, 25, struck again two months later, lifting the roller-door and stealing 36 stubbies worth $50. Within weeks he was back, but when he found the roller-door locked, he forced open a window. He stole another carton of beer and some tools, worth $170. Parkes was jailed for six months.

The same house, 3 times within less than 3 months? Should get some extra time just for that …

Seriously, I thought you were someone else … As reported by The Arkansas Times:

Best reason not to work under your car

In August, a Springdale man, angry at his girlfriend, went to the trailer park where she lived, saw her doing some mechanical work under a jacked-up car, kicked the jack away, causing the car to fall, seriously injuring the woman underneath it. Man was charged with assault, among other felonies, and got no satisfaction from the crime since, uh, it wasn’t his girlfriend the car fell on. Some other woman. No word on whether his plea was, “Oops, sorry! Meant to kill somebody else.”

Think of the last place you would burn rubber. As reported in The Age:

… [a] P-plate driver [driver with a probationary license], 20, who picked up his Holden sedan from the police impound yard at Preston, paid a release fee, got in the car, revved the engine, acknowledged his friends, and did a burn-out as he drove out. He was seen fishtailing the car down Beecher Street before being arrested later that day.

Smooth. Very smooth.

Not that there is ever a “good” time to commit burglary … But if you’re a burglar by trade, you definitely do not want to break into a house when … it’s filled with police officers! As reported by The Age:

TWO men who broke into a Melton [Australia] house at midnight — while police were already inside carrying out a drug raid. The officers, acting on a tip-off that the house was being used to grow hydroponic cannabis, had just arrested a man in his 20s when the burglars broke in through a side window. When they saw the police, they allegedly attacked the officers before running off. They were arrested a few days later.

I’ll give you a hint. Tony Van, of San Francisco, California, went to court to find out what the jury decided in his auto theft case. Here’s another hint, he didn’t take the streetcar to court. (Please, no e-mails if it doesn’t go to the courthouse.) His transportation to court: a stolen Lexus SUV! Here’s how the police discovered this, per the Marin Independent Journal:

While Van was in the courthouse awaiting the verdict, two Civic Center employees on a break noticed some loose Yorkies around a Lexus in the parking lot. As they gathered up the dogs, several puppies were found unattended inside the Lexus on the sweltering day. Authorities suspect some of the dogs jumped out a window.

Sheriff’s deputies were summoned and discovered that the 2005 Lexus had been reported stolen. Then Van came out to the vehicle, with the keys in his possession, authorities said.

Van was arrested, again. And the trial he was there for didn’t turn out so well either.

Van’s jury returned and convicted him in the case of the stolen [$125,000] Porsche [Carrera]. Sentencing is pending.

Doh! Here’s the source.

Did I mention that the Iowa City, Iowa man hugged a cop? Oops. Here’s the story, as reported by the AP.

Hugs aren’t getting any kisses from the law in Iowa City. Luke Schreder is now charged with assault on a peace officer, for hugging a policeman. Authorities say the drunken 21-year-old was told to get away, when Schreder said an officer looked like he needed a hug. Officers say Schreder didn’t take the hint and embraced the officer. That’s when the long arm of the law put the cuffs on the alleged hugger.