Articles Posted in Oops

Are you worse off if you mistext (text the wrong number) or sext? That would depend on what was in the mistext, and who you sent it to. One Mindy Lynn Neugebauer, 26, of Mangum [Oklahoma] would likely go with mistexting. Here’s why, per The Altus Times:

According to reports, agent Chris Counts of the Distirct III Drug Task Force received a text message that said, “if you want a hit of this stuff (reference to illegal narcotics) before it is all gone, you better get over here.” He texted back asking the address and got an answer. Counts checked the utility registration and found it to belong to Neugebauer.

Uh oh.

Officers went to the address and told Neugebauer about the text message, and she said she thought she had sent the message to a friend. She said the hits she was talking about were from a blunt marijuana rolled inside a cigar, and that was all she had in the residence.

Hmmm. Admit to something and hope they’ll buy it and go away. Successful? Nope.

She allowed officers to search the house where they found a loaded .22 caliber pistol in the bathroom closet, and a small plastic sack containing suspected cocaine under her mattress. A field test determined the presence of cocaine from the powder.

The evidence was submitted to the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation laboratory for further testing.

Amazing how a mistyped number can change your life.

A felony warrant was issued for Neugebauer on charges of possession of a controlled substance and unlawful possession of a controlled drug with the intent to distribute. Bond was set at $25,000.

Source: The Altus Times.

I’m guessing this Detroit man (no, not the costumed dude above) was trying to lend a hand to the police in dealing with prostitution in the area. So he posed as a cop, and busted up a “transaction.” Only problem was – he stepped into a sting! The “prostitute” was actually a cop. And a our would-be cop is in a world of trouble. From wxyz in Detroit:

Investigators say that around 5:00 p.m., Wednesday, the man pulled up to a female detective in the area of Vernor and Oakdale on the city’s east side. At the time the detective, who was posing as a prostitute, was talking with another man.

The suspect, who was in a red 1994 Ford Ranger yelled at the detective to “get off the street.” Officers say this is when he flashed a badge. The other man sped off, and officers say the suspect began following the detective ranting that he was a cop. When the detective revealed she was a police officer, the man took off. He was arrested a short time later by the nearby arrest team.

When questioned, the suspect denied having a badge. However, officers say the found a Detroit Police department badge, a loaded .40 caliber Glock pistol and hats and clothing with DPD logos during a search of his truck.

Damn! A loaded glock? In addition to the insult of unknowingly stepping into a real police sting, the charges ….

The suspect is being held in Hamtramck until he can be arraigned on one count of impersonating a police officer.

Movies … real life. Movies … real life. See where we’re going here? Mr. Travis Hayter apparently confused the two, much to the detriment of fellow golfer Alan Bezanson. As reported by the CBC:

A man who hit a golf ball straight at another player, injuring him, has been ordered by the Nova Scotia Court of Appeal to pay more than $225,000 in damages. Plaintiff Alan Bezanson says he hasn’t been able to work since he was injured on June 8, 2002.

The New Glasgow, N.S., man and the defendant, Travis Hayter, were golfing in a foursome that day as part of a wedding celebration for Bezanson’s cousin. By the time they reached the 16th hole, Hayter had consumed nine beers and a half pint of tequila, the court heard.

9 beers AND half a pint of tequila? Incredibly, not only was the dude still standing, he was going all Happy Gimore.

That’s when he ran up to his ball and took a swing out of turn. Someone yelled, “Heads up, he’s going to hit again.” But it was too late for Bezanson, who was standing no more than 20 metres away. Hayter hit what court documents refer to as a “so-called Happy Gilmore shot,” named after a film character played by Adam Sandler.

According to court documents, Bezanson put up his hand to protect himself and the ball hit his left wrist, causing permanent damage to his radial nerve.

Bezanson, a woodcutter, has been unable to work without pain. When the case originally went to court, a judge awarded $227,500 to Bezanson, a father of three.

How did “Happy” take it? He appealed. The grounds?

… it wasn’t the first Happy Gilmore-style shot he had taken that day and Bezanson should have known what was coming.

The result? Not good for Happy.

…the Court of Appeal dismissed that argument, upholding the earlier court’s ruling that Hayter’s behaviour was not a “natural risk” of golfing.

Hayter was ordered to pay Bezanson $85,000 in damages, $67,500 in lost income and $75,000 for lost future earning capacity.

Ouch, all around.

The day may come when The Juice reveals the 11th commandment… But this day, we have the story of a man who violated the 12th commandment: Don’t Be Afraid. And his dog almost paid the ultimate price. Per the Cairns Post:

A man was so convinced he was going to jail for hosting a noisy New Year’s Day party he put his things in storage and arranged to have his dog put down, a Cairns court heard.

But an anxious Keat Paul Wylie, 20, who faced Cairns Magistrates’ Court yesterday for contravening a police direction to turn his stereo down, was told he could only be fined for the offence.

“Mr Wylie has been very stressed, he had actually sought legal advice and was told by the lawyer he was definitely going to jail for six months,” duty lawyer Michelle Emeleus said.

Hmm. Can you say “bar counsel?”

“As a result he had put his property in storage and he was about to have his dog put down.”

Yikes.

The court heard police told Wylie to turn down the music at his home in Cooktown Rd, Edmonton, about 10.30pm on January 1.

But when the loud music continued, they returned at 2.17am to issue him with a notice to appear in court for contravening the direction.

Wylie, who is on a suspended sentence, was fined $250 and had no conviction recorded.

Remember, Juice readers, to heed the 12th commandment: Don’t be afraid!

I would wager that this was one door-to-door salesman some of you Juice readers would be quite pleased to see. What was he selling? Weed! As luck would have it (bad luck, that is), one of the doorbells he rang at 3:30 a.m. was at the home of a Brownsville police officer. Doh! Per The Brownsville Herald:

Anthony Carrazco, 19, was arrested at the officer’s apartment at approximately 3:30 a.m. when he tried to sell the officer three ounces of marijuana, said police spokesman Jimmy Manrrique. He was later charged with one count of possession of marijuana and one count of possession of a prohibited weapon.

And the kicker?

Because the apartment was located near a school zone, the charges were upgraded to state jail felonies.

Damn you school zone! Here’s how it went down, per the police spokesman:

(Carrazco) went to an apartment building in the downtown area. He had over three ounces of marijuana in his possession and obviously looking for people to buy marijuana from him.

An intoxicated Carrazco went door to door looking for a buyer and when a man opened the door, he made the offer.

(Carrazco) asked him if he wanted to buy marijuana. This person he approached is a Brownsville police officer. The officer said he would be right back and went to go get his badge and handcuffs.

Carrazco was cooperative and didn’t offer any resistance.

If you’re wondering “Is there a ‘right’ Mercedes to steal?” – the answer is a resounding “yes.” It would be a Mercedes that doesn’t have a lion in the back.. Per The Telegraph:

Caesar, Circus Probst’s ferocious five-year-old star, was being transported a Mercedes van when the vehicle was stolen.

The thief drove off, but abandoned the vehicle with the engine still running after crashing into a road sign. It was unclear whether the thief’s sudden awareness of the animal in the back of the van had inspired him or her to abort the mission.

Unclear? I think we can probably dispense with the guesswork. Although, that must be one quiet lion …

Police recovered the van in the early hours of Wednesday morning in Wuppertal, in western Germany.

They towed the van away, unaware of its feline freight, and it was not until midday on Wednesday that the circus lion was returned to its rightful owners, more than 12 hours after the adventure began.

In case you’re concerned about Caesar’s well-being …

“Caesar is fine. We’re not worried about him,” said Laurens Thoen, a circus spokesman.

“Since yesterday (Wednesday) afternoon he has been in his enclosure at the circus.”

This guy could not have made it easier for the police officer to bust him. He just flat-out looked guilty. From pennlive.com:

Cesar Lopez, a 29-year-old Lebanon, Pa., man, was busted Saturday when he walked up to a police officer with a small bag of marijuana stuck to his forehead, according to Lebanon police.

Police said the officer went into a Turkey Hill convenience store on Lehman Street at 3:25 a.m. Saturday and saw Lopez holding a baseball cap and peering inside it. When Lopez approached the officer, he looked up, and the officer said he saw a small plastic bag stuck to Lopez’s forehead. The bag appeared to contain marijuana, police said.

The officer retrieved the bag from Lopez’s forehead and said, “Is this what you are looking for?,” according to the police report. Lopez was charged with possession of a small amount of marijuana and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Kind of bizarre, right? Not too.

It is not uncommon for people to hide drugs in the inside lip of a cap, police said.

Here’s the source.

Oh my god! Did you hear that screaming out back? I’m going to call the police! What did the police find? As reported in the Northern Territory News:

Officers scrambled to respond to an emergency call from a woman who reported a possible attack when she heard someone “in distress” behind a fence about 6.30am.

But when police arrived they discovered what the resident had heard was, in fact, cries of passion.

They found a naked couple having sex on a mattress in a laneway backing on to the resident’s property on Gap Rd, Alice Springs.

Um, er, uh …

The officers did not charge the man and woman and asked them to move on.

Talk about ruining the mood …

Darn it! I went and gave it away, didn’t I? If I asked you to guess what some of the members of Polk County’s High Intensity Drug Trafficking Area task force were doing while their coworkers were executing a search warrant, you’d probably guess “playing a Wii” right? As reported by Florida’s News Channel 8:

With guns drawn and flashlights cutting through darkened rooms, Polk County undercover drug investigators stormed the home of convicted drug dealer Michael Difalco near Lakeland in March.

As investigators searched the home for drugs, some drug task force members found other ways to occupy their time. Within 20 minutes of entering Difalco’s house, some of the investigators found a Wii video bowling game and began bowling frame after frame.

In this [alleged] car thief’s defense, how could he have known that the POV (“personally owned vehicle”) he stole belonged to a police officer. Oops. This is from the Colorado Springs Police Blotter:

Summary: On 08/13/2009 at 0600, off duty Officer Ruben Crews reported his POV as stolen from his residence. the vehicle did contain some police gear including his police jacket.

Officer Crews and his spouse were out searching for the vehicle and upon returning to their home they found the vehicle in the driveway. They also discovered that a window had been breached to the residence. Upon searching the outside of the residence, Officer Crews encountered a male identified as Michael Reeder, DOB: 05/30/64, wearing his police jacket. Officer Crews produced his badge and identified himself as a police officer. A struggle ensued and Reeder was taken into custody.

Officer Crews sustained a hand injury and was treated at Memorial Hospital. Reeder sustained a head injury as was taken to Penrose for a medical clearance.

Was Mr. Reeder also singing “Y.M.C.A.” while wearing Officer Crews’s jacket?

Reeder will be charged with Motor Vehicle Theft and Burglary.