Articles Posted in Oops

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Maybe, maybe when the police find a body, they miss a small stab wound. But, and this a big “but,” what if the knife is still in the body? Could they miss it? Yup. As reported in The Medway Messenger:

Police failed to spot a dead pensioner had been murdered – until undertakers found a knife in his back, an inquest heard.

Officers were called to the home of Antoine Denis, in New Road, Chatham, after neighbours raised the alarm.

The 66-year-old was pronounced dead by a police nurse when he was found slumped on his bedroom floor.

But an inquest was told the weapon and a stab wound were only found by undertakers as they prepared to move his body on January 9.

DC [Detective Constable] Linda Robb told coroner Roger Sykes the knife was missed because it was dark in the flat and Mr Denis was lying on his back.

What, you expected the police officer to turn the body over? Don’t be ridiculous.

Recording a verdict of unlawful killing, Mr Sykes said Mr Denis had died from a single stab wound, which penetrated his lung due to “the unlawful act of a person whose identity has not yet been established”.

The perp? Still at large.

Kim Albone, of Luton Road, Chatham, was charged with murder on January 21, but was later released after a decision by the Crown Prosecution Service. Officers are still hunting Mr Denis’ killer.

Here’s the source.

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“Show and tell” didn’t turn out too well for the mother of a Missouri kindergartner. As reported by kctv5.com:

The task for the fresh-faced kindergartner students was to bring important family items for show and tell.

But one kindergartner floored his teacher and local law enforcement officers when police say he pulled his mother’s crack pipe and an ounce of drugs from his backpack.

The child’s mother was charged with possession of a controlled substance and one count of first-degree child endangerment. Bond was set at $7,500 for 32-year-old Michelle Marie Cheatham.

The rocks turned out to be meth. You can read more here.

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It’s hard finding work in this economy. But the economy had nothing to do with this gent not getting a job with the sheriff’s department in Warren County, Mississippi. That would have been due to the outstanding warrant for his arrest! Per The Herald Tribune (Florida):

Authorities say Ronald Wade walked into a sheriff’s department in Mississippi to apply for a job as a jailer.

So, after the routine background check – whoa there buddy!

Warren County Sheriff Martin Pace said the 31-year-old Wade was wanted in Florida on a warrant for driving under the influence-manslaughter.

Pace said Wade had been involved in a wreck in Manatee County, but was never arrested on the charge. The initial background check revealed the warrant for his arrest. Deputies arrested Wade on Wednesday.

That’s one tough collar right there. Mr. Wade waived extradition and is heading back to Florida. Here’s the source.

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Surely you can recall watching a show or a movie where the bad guy gets away, even though he was supposedly surrounded. And you said, or thought, “no way.” Well, it happens in real life too. As reported in The Daily News (Galveston County):

The hijacker [of a cigarette delivery truck] accosted the truck driver as he made a delivery at Bulldog Lane and state Highway 6 in Hitchcock at 11:53 a.m. Tuesday. He led police on an Interstate 45 chase that went to League City, south again to La Marque and back to League City.

He’s going in circles, and they’re not going to catch him?

The pursuit, involving several police agencies ended shortly after noon when the hijacker crashed into a tree-lined fence south of League City United Methodist Church off Wesley Drive.

Police described the hijacker as a black man, who wore all black and was of medium height and build. Police last saw him armed with a gun as he ran into a neighborhood. That prompted heavily armed police to close streets in the area.

After all that, how could he escape?

Police wore bullet-resistant vests and went door-to-door looking for the gunman. After an extensive search using a police dog and helicopter surveillance, police were unable to find him, League City police Sgt. John Jordan said.

Fortunately, nobody was hurt. Here’s the source.

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Before I tell you what Christopher Lucero told New Mexico State Police Officer Kurtis Ward, just remember one thing: he was drunk! As reported in The Albuquerque Journal, Lucero said he was weaving because:

His passenger spilled his beer …

Doh! There’s more.

… next to Lucero, 31, was a half-emptied bottle of Corona in a cup holder, police said. And that wasn’t even the beer he spilled. That was the one he had popped open to replace the one that had spilled on the floorboard while he went across three lanes of traffic on the interstate …

What about the field sobriety tests? Lucero was too drunk to do them. And, this was his SIXTH DWI arrest. What was he still doing on the road?

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If you find yourself at home with a court-ordered ankle monitor on, you might think you really can’t leave the house undetected. This would be true for most people, but not Mr. Christopher Lowcock. For Mr. Lowcock, beating the ankle monitor was a breeze. How so? Here’s how, per The Guardian:

Private security firm G4S has sacked two members of staff who tagged a man’s false leg, allowing him to remove it and flout a court-imposed curfew.

How could they not have known they were tagging a prosthesis?

Christopher Lowcock, 29, fooled the two employees by wrapping a prosthetic leg in a bandage when they set up the tag at his home in Rochdale, Greater Manchester.

He was then able to remove the limb and break a curfew imposed for offences involving drugs, driving and a weapon.

You fell for the bandaged prosthesis? That has to be the oldest … uh, never mind. It’s probably never even been attempted. So how did he get caught?

G4S revealed managers became suspicious last month but when they returned to Lowcock’s home he had been returned to custody accused of a driving-related offence.

Oops. Here’s the source.

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Let’s just ignore the fact that the judge explicitly instructed you otherwise. If you were a juror, would you try to friend one of the parties, in the middle of the trial? A young man in Texas did, as reported by The Fort Worth Star-Telegram.

[Jonathan] Hudson was a juror on a Tarrant County civil case last month when he tried to “friend” the defendant and discussed the case on his Facebook page, according to court records. The woman notified her lawyer who, in turn, told the presiding judge, Wade Birdwell.

Dude! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? And about the judge’s instructions …

Texas recently added specific language to jury instructions that bans jurors from discussing the case on social networking sites such as Facebook and Twitter, which was in the instructions given to Hudson, officials said.

Doh! After attempting to weasel out of it (“saying he thought she was someone else”), Mr. Hudson pleaded guilty to contempt of court, and was sentenced to 2 days of community services.You can read more here.

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Um, Mr. French man. Why not just start yelling “anyone want my iPhone, wallet and passport?” Because that’s pretty much what you did. As reported at BrooklynPaper.com:

The 19-year-old [French tourist] was supposed to meet a friend between Van Brunt and Richards streets at 12:15 am, but his chum was nowhere to be found when he arrived.

Confused, the victim turned to the thieves, asking them if he was at the right place. They responded by putting him in a headlock and running off with his iPhone, wallet and his French passport.

There must be a word for a foreign “hayseed,” no?

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So maybe this tanning salon customer didn’t use those exact words, but just about. As reported by The Daily News (Washington State):

In a recently released report, police said Mary Marilyn Greene of Longview called Island Sun Tanning on July 8, asking if employees there had found “something bad.” Greene, who identified herself by name, had been a customer at the tanning salon earlier in the day, the report said.

Employees later found a bag containing a white, crystal-like substance on the floor of the salon’s lobby. At the request of police, an employee called Greene, who said she was on her way over to pick up the drugs.

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You have to be pretty hammered to think that the candor pander has any chance of working when you’re driving drunk. As reported by www.beenews.com (New York):

A man was arrested for driving while intoxicated after patrol observed his vehicle 
pass 
through a steady red light at Seneca Creek Road and swerve several times on 
Union Road.

The 
man told patrol, “I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been drinking,” then produced a Rite Aid 
rewards card 
for ID instead of his driver’s license.

Doh!