Articles Posted in Extra Pulp

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Sounds like something from a movie. Wait, it was in a movie … As reported by The Mirror:

A woman tunnelled out of jail using a spoon.

The attractive un-named 35-year-old – doing 18 years for trying to murder her sister-in-law – was called “a dish” by local newspapers.

Her lawyer Ludo Hameleers said: “She would have been released in 18 months. She just couldn’t wait.”

The woman, who had served 12 years, dug the 30ft tunnel from a cellar of her Dutch jail, hid the soil in her trouser legs and then sprinkled it around the yard – a ruse straight from classic PoW tale The Great Escape.

Here’s the source.

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The Juice enjoys the occasional game of chance. But not if it’s going to end this way … As reported by the Palm Beach Post News:

Anthony Lindsey, 18, of Belle Glade … is charged with attempted first degree murder, attempted robbery and aggravated battery, all with a firearm, in a December assault on Edenson Major, 20, of Belle Glade, authorities said.

According to a Palm Beach County Sheriff’s Office arrest affidavit, a dispute arose after Lindsey and Major played a game of dice on the afternoon of Dec. 1. Major told investigators that Lindsey became upset when he lost $80 to Major, as well as monies to others.

$80?!

Lindsey left the game and later returned with a 9mm handgun, the affidavit said. He approached Major and said ‘gimme back my money’ and then pulled out the gun and started shooting. The group playing the game fled the area and Lindsey chased Major down the street as he continued shooting.

Here’s the source.

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Folks in Valentine, Nebraska can now breathe a huge sigh of relief because the Butt Bandit has been arrested. It’s not clear why they call him the Butt Bandit since neither his butt, nor any other part of him, ever stole anything. To the contrary, he actually leaves something behind [bad pun, I know], his butt (and/or groin) prints in vaseline or lotion. As reported in The North Platte Bulletin:

The rash of bizarre behavior began in May 2007. Valentine police already had fielded about 20 different reports by this time a year ago.

Rewards offered through Crime Stoppers failed to provide any leads. No physical structure has been damaged, although producing the printings probably involved indecent exposure, officials believe.

The charges? They haven’t been filed yet – perhaps because they’re tring to come up with the crime? Criminal vaselining? First-degree buttprinting? Here’s the source.

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So you get popped in the face. Why wouldn’t you call the cops? Well, it depends on who’s doing the popping, and who gets popped. Per the San Diego Union Tribune:

A man who was busy robbing his elderly victim Saturday became so upset when a bystander tried to break up the crime by punching him in the face that he called police to report an assault.

Brilliant!

Once [the police] put two and two together, police officers located the 83-year-old victim, who confirmed the crime, and arrested the 43-year-old man for suspected elder abuse and robbery, said San Diego police Officer David Stafford.

Police were called at 4 p.m. to Akins Avenue at 62nd Street near a trolley station, where the robber had the elderly man pinned against a wall and was rifling through his pockets when the bystander interrupted the crime, Stafford said.

Here’s to the unnamed “bystander” who didn’t just “stand by.”

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As you can see from yesterday’s post, folks have not been happy with McDonald’s lately. A woman at a McDonald’s in Kansas City just LOST it over her hamburger order. As reported by KMBC-TV:

On Dec. 27, a woman at the McDonald’s at 3255 Main St. was upset about her order and returned her hamburger twice, demanding her money back.

Surveillance video showed that the woman started throwing things. She grabbed a water dispenser and dumped it on the counter. She also shoved a cookie container and several cash registers off the counter and threw a “Wet Floor” sign at the clerk.

When the clerk said she was going to call police, the woman fled the restaurant.

You can see the surveillance video here.

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This woman either had a serious case of the munchies, is just filled with rage, or is an alien sent to earth specifically to gather chicken nuggets. As reported by WNWO in Toledo, Ohio:

Toledo Police say Melodi Dushane, 24, stopped at the fast-food restaurant at Front and Main Streets in East Toledo early Friday morning and asked for chicken nuggets. When the drive-thru attendant told her the restaurant was only serving breakfast and that the item was not available, Dushane reached through the window and punched the attendant in the mouth.

Talk about shooting the messenger … But that’s not all …

After a night manager came to the window, Dushane began swinging her fists at her. The manager attempted to pull Dushane through the window by her hair. After being released, Dushane then punched through the drive-thru’s glass window.

Damn!

Dushane was treated at Mercy St. Charles Hospital for her injuries and then incarcerated at the Lucas County Jail.

In court on Saturday, Dushane pleaded not guilty to a felony vandalism charge. She was released from police custody on her own recognizance and is scheduled to be in court next on Jan. 28.

Think she’ll be going back to that McDonald’s anytime soon? Nope.

A judge has ordered that Dushane not visit the 90 Main St. McDonald’s location again.

That leaves about 13,000 other McDonald’s (in the U.S. – really) that she is free to visit… Here’s the source, including a photo of Ms. Dushane.

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Yes, folks, this bird is protected by the Constitution, as the City of Pittsburgh learned the hard way. Back in 2006, David Hackbart (of Butler, Pennsylvania) flipped off a cop, and got a disorderly conduct citation. He fought it, hard. Per the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review:

Pittsburgh City Council initially approved today a $50,000 settlement for a lawsuit filed by a Butler County man who gave the middle finger to a motorist and a police officer in 2006.

The officer cited him for disorderly conduct. The county eventually dropped the charge, but Hackbart sued to recover the cost of defending himself. U.S. District Judge David S. Cercone ruled in March that the officer violated Hackbart’s First Amendment right to free speech.

You can read more bird-flipping stories here, here, here, and here

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Sure, you might wield a gun. You might scream. How about barking like a dog? From The Athens Banner-Herald:

A Simmons Street woman scared off a would-be burglar about 11 p.m. Saturday by acting like a dog, an Athens-Clarke police report said.

When a suspicious man tried turning the woman’s door knob, she got on the floor and began scratching at the door and acting like a large dog, police said, though what dog-like behaviors she specifically mimicked remains unknown.

Talk about thinking on your feet (all four of them) …

The man, who wore an olive jacket and appeared to be homeless, quickly ran from the porch, according to the report. Police searched the neighborhood for him, but to no avail.

Who needs a dog when you can just imitate one? (Dog people – please – no hate mail!)