Articles Posted in Extra Pulp

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All couples have disagreements. Fortunately, most folks don’t handle them the way this Sioux Falls, South Dakota couple did. Here’s what went down, as reported by The Argus Leader (per the police):

Edward Martin Lopez Jr. and Russett Lynn Cantrell, both 27, began to argue at their home … early Sunday morning.

Mr. Lopez struck Ms. Cantrell.

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A police officer who stepped up in a Fortitude Valley freestyle rap battle has become a cult hit on YouTube, as reported by The Courier-Mail.

The clip shows the officer being taunted by local rapper Fluence, who risks arrest for obscenity and public nuisance with a line about “makin’ bacon”.

Instead of whipping out the cuffs, Constable Jay pulls out a put-down – referring to his adversary “downloading gay porn and watching it in slow-mo”. The crowd erupts. Constable Jay then quells the uproar with a plea to “not cause too much of a ruckus”. Constable Jay has since earned the nickname “Slim Shady” from his fellow officers.

Here it is:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EcudMeUfqD8

Constable Jay may have a new career …

And Real Talk Battles League president Dennyson Willoughby has invited him to participate in a police versus citizens “battle” fundraiser at the PCYC. “Honestly, I’ve had run-ins with officers and I’ve never met one so cool,” Mr Willougby said.

“He just basically stood there, took it with a grain of salt, gave back his two cents and before it got out of hand, said: ‘Oi, oi, calm down’.

“He’s obviously got skills. Not only did his rhyme make sense, and it was an effective punchline, but he actually fed off of Fluence’s rhyme scheme, rhyming ‘low-low’ and ‘po po’ with ‘hobo’ and ‘slo-mo’.

“It was a pure, quality, 100 per cent battle-style rebuttal – which came from a cop… which was unexpected.”

Here’s the source.

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So says Green Tree [Pennsylvania] Council President Mark Sampogna. As reported in The Pittsburgh Post-Gazette:

Green Tree officials said they will not pursue any disciplinary action against police Chief Andrew Lisiecki for his conduct while on prostitution detail last month.

In the letter to Pittsburgh Police Chief Nate Harper and the Allegheny County Chiefs of Police Association, District Attorney Stephen A. Zappala Jr. said the Pennsylvania court determined that it is not necessarily inappropriate for police officers to take off their clothes during such investigations.

Media reports and a criminal complaint revealed that the chief allegedly took off his clothes during an undercover investigation during a sting operation on Sept. 9 at the Radisson Green Tree.

Oh the humanity! The poor man had to get naked in bed with a woman! We already know who to blame for this.

“The fact is that the prostitutes are extremely aware of the laws and know precisely how to avoid arrest” [said Mr. Sampogna].

“What is required for an arrest and conviction is an overt act that unfortunately may require the officer to disrobe. As distasteful as this may seem, the judicial system has created these levels of proof,” he said.

What’s distasteful is the imposition of one’s morals on others. But hey, it’s the law. So violate it at your peril. The more relevant law though? The law of supply and demand. Here’s the source.

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Is it really a good idea to let someone tattoo your back after you’ve had an argument with him? Um, NO, as a 25-year-old Australian man learned the hard way. The tattoo was supposed to be a yin yang symbol with dragons. As reported by The Courier Mail:

A 21-year-old man has been charged by police in Ipswich for allegedly tattooing a penis on a man’s back – instead of the image he had requested.

Yikes.

The 25-year-old victim had been visiting the man, an amateur tattooist, at his home in Bundamba last Wednesday when he was talked into getting a tattoo.

He wanted a yin and yang symbol with some dragons, but was instead shocked to discover the 40cm [almost 16 inches!] tattoo was of a penis with an obscene slogan.

The key word in the slogan was also misspelled.

Talk about adding insult to injury.

The man now faces considerable cost [and pain?] to have the image removed.

Police said the tattooing followed an argument between the men, during which the tattooist allegedly took offence at something the other man said.

The victim has also alleged he was punched and thrown out of the house following the tattooing.

All-in-all, not a good night for the vic. What about the perp? Any charges?

The 21-year-old is due to appear in Ipswich Magistrates Court on November 15 charged with two counts of assault occasioning bodily harm and one charge relating to the Public Safety Act.

Here’s the source.

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Back in December, a Costa Mesa, California woman, who was herself going through a rough patch, allowed a woman to sleep in her car. Upon returning to the car, she reports that the sleeping woman had died. So what did she do? Nothing! Here’s what happened, and how the police just discovered the body, as reported by The Orange County Register:

Investigators said the driver of the car had befriended the woman at Mile Square Regional Park and allowed her to sleep in the car overnight in December. That was the last time she saw Signe [a transient woman from the Fountain Valley area] alive, Everett said.

After finding the body inside the four-door vehicle, the woman [who said she was a 57-year-old former real estate agent who at one time lived in a home in Corona del Mar] told investigators she was afraid to report the body to police, and instead decided to continue using the vehicle while the body sat covered in clothes on the passenger’s side.

How was the body discovered?

It wasn’t until Monday that the body was found by police, after receiving a call of a car partially blocking a driveway at the 2000 block of Tustin Avenue.

Officers were able to smell a foul odor coming from the car, and after seeing a leg underneath a pile of clothing on the seat, broke a window to get access inside.

Inside the car, officers also found a box of baking soda that the driver used to try to dissipate the smell.

Could the good samaritan be charged? Maybe.

An autopsy has revealed no obvious signs of foul play, but the cause of death is still unknown, he said. Officers are also looking at whether there were any health code violations due to the fact that the driver was transporting a corpse, he said. The driver has not been cited or arrested.

Click here to read the full story, which includes photos and a video.

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Man, this crime thing is easy. They’ll never catch us! Hey, I need some new jeans. Let’s head over to Walmart … Well, that’s what 20-year-old Dustin Matthew Marshall and 19-year-old Lindsey Samantha Scholl apparently did. And Mr. Marshall got his jeans. But when he took off with the new ones, he left the old ones behind in the dressing room … with his wallet in the pocket! As reported by NewsChannel5.com (Nashville, Tennessee):

Police said they arrested two people in a string of thefts after one of the suspect’s literally left his identification behind.

… Matthew … and … Scholl were arrested and charged with charged with burglary, three counts of theft from a motor vehicle, two counts of theft under $500 and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Police said they were able to identify the pair as suspects in a string of thefts since October 14 after Marshall allegedly stole a pair of jeans and left his old jeans, containing his wallet with his driver’s license inside, behind in the dressing room at Walmart.

On Saturday night, police said the suspects fled the Longhorn Steakhouse in Gallatin without paying for their meal and left behind evidence that linked them to one of the auto burglaries.

The police never had it this easy.

Officers later located the pair outside their home on East Prince Street and subsequently obtained a search warrant which produced evidence connected the suspects to the remaining auto burglaries and a burglary at the Christian Towers Apartments.

Both Marshall and Scholl were arrested and booked into the Sumner County Jail.

Here’s the source, including photos of the accused.

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The public library is a terrific place for a 92-year-old man to … hook up? So thought Florida resident Herbert Johnson. The library’s employees were not flattered. Per nbcmiami.com:

Stuart resident Herbert Johnson, 92, has been ordered to stay out of Martin County public libraries after waging an amorous campaign toward female employees.

His offensive included, for one librarian in particular, a letter left on the front desk “containing sexually explicit language stating what (he) wanted to do to” her.

Authorities say Johnson also sent the woman “innapropriate” gifts and letters, which she either refused or destroyed. A second employee reported Johnson made unwanted advances toward her, as well.

You’re really not going to tell us what the “inappropriate” gifts were? Not cool.

A Martin County deputy visited Johnson at home, handing him a trespass warning for all county libraries.

Banned! Here’s the source.

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Well, when you’re “managing” something, you still have to use it, right? Maybe that’s what happened when a woman allegedly stabbed her classmate during an anger management class! As reported by The Seattle Times:

Bellevue police say Faribah Maradiaga [age 19] “blew up out of control” and stabbed the classmate’s arm and shoulder several times after the two women exchanged words.

Police said Maradiaga, who already has a pending assault charge, told them that the other woman had threatened her first, according to charging documents.

Maradiaga walked into a classroom on the Bellevue College campus, where a court services agency rents space for the anger management class, around 9 a.m. Saturday while a video on anger management was being shown, according to the charges. Maradiaga started complaining about the movie and disrupting the class, according to the documents, when the victim told Maradiaga “the video was good and to give it a chance.”

That’s the provocation?

Maradiaga, who was sitting two rows behind the victim, then stood up and started talking “trash” before pulling out a knife with a 3-inch blade and stabbing the other woman, police and prosecutors say.

Of course. Everyone brings a knife to anger management class. You might need it to defend yourself if someone snaps …

The charges [second degree assault] say Maradiaga then threatened to kill the victim’s family. Maradiaga is being held on $50,000 bail in King County Jail and is scheduled to be arraigned Oct. 25.

The family too? Yikes. Here’s the source.