When this lady told her husband not to smoke, she meant it. And brother, did she drive the point home when he defied her. Per The Northwest Florida Daily News:
A woman was arrested Wednesday morning for beating her husband with a rock, claiming she didn’t want him to smoke a cigarette because of his poor health. “A woman can only take so much,” she told a deputy.
Even the non-lawyers among you must be familiar with the “I can only take so much” defense.
Before you honk your horn, just remember that there are folks like this out there. As reported by The Post And Courier (Charleston, South Carolina):
The complainant, 22, of Daniel Island said she was in line for the drive-through at about 2 a.m. when a pickup truck in front of her was taking a very long time, the report says.
She said she honked her horn [NO!!], and then the passenger in the truck, a woman of about 20, got out and came back to her vehicle and began yelling and screaming through her window, the report states.
The unknown woman then reportedly sat on the hood of the complainant’s car while hitting the front of it.
The complainant said the truck then pulled up and an unknown man, also about 20, jumped out of the truck, ran back to her car and started kicking the front bumper. The complainant said the incident scared her because the pair were “just acting crazy,” the report states. She gave police the truck’s license plate number.
The reporting officer did not observe any damages to the woman’s car, but she was given a case number. Nothing further was reported.
Yikes.
Seriously, are you ever going to escape from the police armed with a dildo? From The Chicago Tribune:
Carolee Bildsten, 56, of Gurnee, will plead not guilty next month to accusations that she charged an officer with the “clear, rigid feminine pleasure device” described in a police report, defense attorney Neil Calanca said.
Mr. Calanca was not pleased with the inclusion of a description of the “weapon.”
A former police officer, Calanca said the officer involved in the incident “should be ashamed of himself,” and that he would have been embarrassed to include such information in a police report. Gurnee police Cmdr. Jay Patrick countered that such reports “are required to be a factual account of an incident.”
So what led to the brandishing of the “clear, rigid feminine pleasure device?”
The alleged assault occurred when the officer went with Bildsten to her apartment in the 5300 block of David Court on Nov. 9 after employees at Joe’s Crab Shack in Gurnee accused her of dining without paying for the second time, according to Patrick.
Bildsten reached into a dresser drawer for what the officer thought was money to pay her bill, but instead pulled out the “pleasure device,” police allege. The officer deflected the sex toy with his hand, and he was not injured, Patrick said.
The charges?
Along with the aggravated assault charge, Bildsten is scheduled to appear in court on Jan. 27 on the Crab Shack-related theft of services charge and an unrelated charge for aggravated driving under the influence of alcohol.
Click here for the source.
Yes, although it’s not exactly sweeping the nation, apparently you can get high from sewage gas. It’s called Jenkem. If this dude in Fort Pierce, Florida is any indication, it’s bad news. As reported by TCPalm.com:
A rooming house reeking of human waste in the 100 block of North 11th Street was evacuated late Wednesday and closed because a disgruntled second-floor renter apparently emptied buckets of raw sewage inside and left, according to police reports.
Police say the upstairs renter probably has been using the sewage to create a gas that when inhaled creates a euphoric high similar to cocaine. The gas — called Jenkem — is collected in a balloon on top of a closed container filled with digesting human waste.
“Highs” from the gas can last 20 minutes, but police quoted the landlord as saying the renter had become aggressive. And six months after moving in, the renter was told to get out, police reports show.
The landlord “theorized that …. (the renter) may have intentionally destroyed his building with ordure (excrement) as a means of revenge for having been ejected from the property,” the report says.
Not cool.
Police were first alerted 10:55 p.m. Wednesday when a downstairs renter came home to repulsive smells. The first officer on the scene also “noticed a strong foul odor (that) wafted through the cold night air,” reports show.
Inside the downstairs room the renter found brown liquid running down the walls and coming through ceiling. Some was in the curtains and on the floor.
Because of the smells, a police officer used an outside staircase to get to an upstairs hallways and to a room “covered with dark substance that appeared to be fecal matter,” according to the police report. “The room had several dozen containers and a five-gallon bucket….containing some of the material” that was dumped onto the floor and furniture.
Worst tenant ever!
Rebuilding the rooming house could cost $150,000, said police who continuing to investigate the case and whether to file charges.
Ouch. Here’s the source.
Clearly times are tough. But check this out, from a sermon by Anglican priest Tim Jones, per The Daily Mail:
He told parishioners [shoplifting from major stores] would not break the eighth commandment ‘thou shalt not steal’ because it ‘is permissible for those who are in desperate situations to take food that they might not starve’.
Really? The Juice hasn’t seen that version of the ten commandments.
Father Jones, 42, was discussing Mary and the birth of Jesus when he went on to the subject of how poor and vulnerable people cope in the run-up to Christmas.
‘My advice, as a Christian priest, is to shoplift,’ he told his stunned congregation at St Lawrence and St Hilda in York.
‘I would ask that they do not steal from small family businesses, but from large national businesses, knowing that the costs are ultimately passed on to the rest of us in the form of higher prices.
‘I would ask them not to take any more than they need. I offer the advice with a heavy heart. Let my words not be misrepresented as a simplistic call for people to shoplift.
Good luck getting that genie back in the bottle. You can read more (a fair amount) here.
Google probably gets sued everyday for some wacky reason. Add this one to the list – in the “Google satellite – underwear” category. As reported by The Mainichi Daily News:
A woman [in Fukuoka] is suing search-engine giant Google Inc., saying her psychological condition worsened after discovering that a search for her address brought up a photo of her underwear hanging out on her veranda.
The woman, who is in her 20s, filed suit against Google at the Fukuoka District Court for 600,000 yen [$7,162 US] in consolation money and other payments.
Sure, some people don’t get along with their in-laws. And some parents don’t get along with their kids’ spouses. But this? A whole ‘nother level, as reported in The Las Cruces Sun-News:
A 44-year-old woman who allegedly ripped her daughter-in-law’s nipple off during a drunken argument could be facing criminal charges, the 3rd Judicial District Attorney’s Office confirmed Wednesday.
Ouch, ouch, ouch!
It’s believed to be the first time a local victim has suffered a body part being torn from them, said Chief Deputy District Attorney Amy Orlando.
Ya think?
The victim told officers she, her husband, his mother and one of her husband’s friends had spent Saturday night drinking …
Wait, alcohol was involved?
Sometime after 3 a.m., the victim’s husband had started arguing with his mother, and because it was becoming “very intense,” the victim went to stand in between the two to separate them.
Uh-oh.
When the victim began arguing with her 44-year-old mother-in-law, the older woman allegedly “grabbed (the victim’s) right breast and began to squeeze and pull on her nipple.” The victim yelled to stop, but her mother-in-law allegedly continued to pull until the younger woman began punching her in the face, according to the police report.
The victim then told police she threw her mother-in-law into the yard, but the older woman allegedly kicked in the back door and had to be physically removed again. It was when the victim was putting her mother-in-law’s belongings in the yard that she felt fluid on her breast and realized there was blood on her shirt.
When she untucked her tank top, her nipple fell on the floor, she told police.
YEOW! Can you fix that? …
… doctors were already in the process of reattaching the nipple to the 30-year-old victim’s breast [when Las Cruces police officers responded to Memorial Medical Center on Sunday morning].
Whew. You can read more here.
Why would anyone break into a store that gives everything away for free? From the CBC …
The Free Store, located near 84th Street and 118th Avenue, opened earlier this year. People pay a $2 fee to drop off unwanted items, and store customers can take whatever they want for free.
Co-owner Brandon Tyson came into the store on Thursday night and found two men inside. They’d kicked out the front window, leaving a lot of glass to clean up.
“For the most part, being a free store, we wouldn’t expect someone to come and rob us because they can come back and get it all free the next day,” Tyson said. “But I guess apparently some people do.”
“For the most part”? No, for the WHOLE PART!
Tyson chased the two would-be thieves out of the store, caught one of them and called the police. He said the men were drunk.
Alcohol was involved? Shocking! Here’s the source.
The Juice is thinking this might have gone down differently if the doctor had expressed interest in the drugs this pharmaceutical salesman was peddling. But he didn’t. Here’s how it went down, as reported by The Independent:
Pakistani authorities have arrested a doctor on suspicion of violating the country’s contentious blasphemy laws after he threw away the business card of a man who shared the name of the Prophet.
Naushad Valiyani, a Muslim doctor in Hyderabad, in Sindh province, was arrested after a complaint to police alleging he had insulted the Prophet.
The case began when Muhammad Faizan, a pharmaceutical representative, gave Mr Valiyani his business card. When the doctor threw it away, Mr Faizan filed a complaint, noting that his name was the same as the Prophet’s.
Here’s the source.
It pays to know and understand the Constitution, especially the 5th Amendment. A man in Fort Walton Beach, Florida would be well-advised to read it, or at least catch a few episodes of Law & Order. As reported by the Northwest Florida Daily News:
A man stopped for driving with an inoperable brakelight on Nov. 23 was questioned when the officer noticed the man’s pants were unbuttoned and unzipped. The condition of the man’s pants was obvious when he was asked to step out and look at the lights for himself.
Yeah, probably the first guy ever to have a partially unzipped fly…
When the officer questioned him, the driver said he had just left his girlfriend’s house and had picked up the 36-year-old female in his car to give her a ride home.
Okay…
After the officer advised the man that he believed a sexual act was performed in the vehicle, the man said the female had offered to perform that sexual act for $20. The man added that he had paid the $20 but had not yet gotten the act.
Really? It’s not like you were tied to a chair, with a hammer about to smash your toes. How about this answer: nuh-uh.
The defendant had $20 in her pocket, according to her Fort Walton Beach Police Department arrest report.
She was charged with soliciting for prostitution.
Really? What about the loose-lipped, would-be john? Not cool.
Legal Juice