Articles Posted in Best Of

It’s just a bunny, right? Wrong, as Elizabeth Johnson, a junior at Gateway High School in Kissimmee, Florida learned. Her crime? She wore sweat pants with a Playboy bunny and the word “Playboy.” The time? Two days of detention! From a UPI article, here are the highlights:

Elizabeth Johnson, a junior at Gateway High School, said a dean approached her at school and instructed her to change out of her black Playboy sweat pants, which she did. She was forced to stay for an hour after school for two days, the Orlando (Fla.) Sentinel reported Tuesday.

Johnson said there was nothing inappropriate about her attire, despite Playboy’s connection to soft-core pornography.

If you’re having success running the ball, you keep running the ball until the opposing team counters it by, say, putting more men in the box. (Yes, The Juice likes football.) But in life, going back to something that worked is not always a good idea, especially in the world of crime. Just ask this gent. As reported by The New Hampshire Union Leader:

A Plymouth man was arrested for allegedly committing two armed robberies at the same location about six weeks apart, police said Saturday.

Yup. He did.

Please, please, please just tell The Juice you did not fall for the oldest trick in the book – the “key swap.” Okay, so The Juice had never heard of the “key swap” either. As reported by tcpalm.com:

It sounds like a Hollywood heist. Thieves stole a $55,000 vehicle from the Arrigo Dodge dealership Wednesday afternoon without breaking a sweat or a window.

Maybe Hollywood, Florida, but pretty smooth nonetheless.

Talk about chutzpah. Check out this burglary, as reported by Sweden’s “The Local” and “Helsingborgs Dagblad”

A thief in southern Sweden took time off during a weekend break-in to surf pornographic websites on a company computer … local newspaper Helsingborgs Dagblad reports.

Here comes the real chutzpah:

What would you do if you had a sweet tooth, but no cashish to satisfy it? Hopefully not what this gent in Louisiana did. As reported by The Advocate:

The suspected “Brownie Bandit,” a burglar with a sweet tooth, was arrested after a more-than-two-week run pilfering a Gonzales bakery of its stocks of sugary baked goods and other treats, police said.

Officers caught Jamon J. Simoneaux, 18, 2228 S. Burnside Ave., Lot No. 133, Gonzales, inside Jumonville’s Bakery after business hours Thursday with a bag full of chocolate-frosted brownies, the Police Department reported in a news release Friday.

“Hey buddy, I think you’ve had a few too many. Why don’t you let me drive you home?” That didn’t go over so well. As reported by The New Hampshire Union Leader:

A Raymond man was arrested early Friday after hitting a friend in the parking lot of the Raymond American Legion with his vehicle and fleeing the scene, police said.

Edward Miller, 56, was charged with driving under the influence of liquor and conduct after an accident, police said.

Clearly he didn’t go about it the right way, and not to disparage White Castle, but having had their burgers, The Juice can testify that they would definitely go down better with beer, or any other alcoholic beverage. As reported by riverfronttimes.com (St. Louis, Missouri):

A White Castle customer was so upset he couldn’t wash his sliders down with an ice cold beer that he stabbed another customer in the head, police say.

The knife-wielding craver was trying to BYOB around 3:50 a.m. Tuesday at the downtown White Castle on South Broadway near Busch Stadium when an employee asked him to leave. A 57-year-old customer came to the employee’s defense, and the suspect stabbed him once in the head.