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In another installment of “Curse you, McDonald’s!”, a woman at a McDonald’s in Kansas City just LOST it over her hamburger order. As reported by KMBC-TV:

On Dec. 27, a woman at the McDonald’s at 3255 Main St. was upset about her order and returned her hamburger twice, demanding her money back.

Surveillance video showed that the woman started throwing things. She grabbed a water dispenser and dumped it on the counter. She also shoved a cookie container and several cash registers off the counter and threw a “Wet Floor” sign at the clerk.

When the clerk said she was going to call police, the woman fled the restaurant.

Hmm. I wonder where she’s headed …

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Let’s just say that Virginia Governor Bob McDonnell did not get off to a very good start, unless, that is, you think it’s just fine to discriminate against homosexuals. As reported by talkingpointsmemo.com:

McDonnell (R) on Feb. 5 signed an executive order that prohibits discrimination “on the basis of race, sex, color, national origin, religion, age, political affiliation, or against otherwise qualified persons with disabilities,” as well as veterans.

So what’s the change?

[The executive order] rescinds the order that Gov. Tim Kaine signed Jan. 14, 2006 as one of his first actions. After promising a “fair and inclusive” administration in his inaugural address, Kaine (D) added veterans to the non-discrimination policy – and sexual orientation.

Here’s the source.

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The Juice yearns for the good old days, when robbers and burglars used to just rob and burgle. Alas, it appears we shan’t be returning to those days. Previously, we learned about the Beanie Baby robber. Today, it’s the fish-killing robbers. Per the TribLocal:

Three goldfish were killed when a burglar poured hot sauce, mustard, ketchup and spices into a fish tank and stole a BB gun among other items from an Arlington Heights apartment, police said Wednesday.

You bastards! You killed … the goldfish! [South Park reference]

The front door of an apartment on the 2100 block of South Goebbert Road was pried open sometime between Jan. 22 and Jan. 24, and burglars made off with a Nintendo game system, CD player, 30 games, 30 DVDs, a Daisy BB gun with extra BBs, jewelry and a 50-pound fire safe containing personal papers and pictures, police said.

Here’s the source.

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Especially if you’re doing it with a random nude body and your ex-girlfriend’s head. Rustan Ang now knows this. As reported in the Philippine Daily Inquirer:

The Court of Appeals has affirmed a four-year prison term, P100,000 fine ($2,470 U.S.) and mandatory psychiatric treatment for a man who threatened to spread a pornographic picture with his ex-girlfriend’s face on it after she rebuffed his attempts to rekindle their relationship.

… On June 5, 2005, Ang sent her a picture through her cell phone of a nude woman with her legs apart. The face was hers. The day before, Ang, who is married, asked her to be his textmate but she refused.She said her face was apparently lifted from a photo taken with Ang when they visited Baguio during their three-month relationship.

Ang warned her in a subsequent text message that it would be easy to post the pornographic picture on the internet, and asked if she wanted him to send more lewd pictures of her.

So she went to the police, and Ang was busted. He was found guilty of violating the Anti-Violence Against Women and Children Act. Four years in prison! To read more (just a little) click here.

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Nothing wrong with shooting at cans with a .22 … unless it’s in the middle of a suburban neighborhood! What kind of dope would do this? This kind, as reported at www.thedestinlog.com:

Two men were arrested Thursday after a homeowner on Pompano Street complained he’d found two bullet holes in his garage door.

That’s a little frightening, but it gets worse.

According to a Santa Rosa County Sheriff’s Office release, while the homeowner was showing a deputy the damage, a bullet passed within 2 feet of the deputy and hit the garage door.

Oh, now it’s on.

Backup units were called and four men were found in the back yard of another home on the same street.

The men had been firing a bolt action, .22 caliber rifle. Two of the men, twin brothers Tyler and Nicholas Hulick, both 19, had fired the rifle at a can and a tree in the back yard.

When Tyler fired a shot that hit the homeowner’s garage, one of the men with him told him he “nearly hit someone” and to “not shoot again.”

Good advice. Surely he listened to his twin brother.

Nicholas then took the gun from Tyler and said, “I wanna shoot some gun,” the release said. Nicholas fired four to six shots in the same direction.

Clearly theses dudes are not “identical” twins.

The can the two men were aiming at was on top of a privacy fence. Nicholas told deputies he shot at a tree in the back yard for a “very short time” before deputies arrived.

From the spot where the men were shooting there was a clear line of sight to the home where the deputy and the homeowner were standing. The two other men present did not fire the rifle. Both brothers were arrested and transported to the Santa Rosa County Jail.

The charges?

Nicholas Scott Hulick was charged with improper exhibition of a firearm, discharging a firearm in public and shooting into a dwelling. He was released on an $11,000 bond. Tyler Grant Hulick, was charged with improper exhibition of a firearm and discharging a firearm in public. He was released on a $2,000 bond.

Sounds about right to The Juice.

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Rule number one: Make sure the getaway car has enough gas to get away! Rule number two: Don’t commit your crime in full view of surveillance cameras. A man in Albany, Georgia broke both rules, and will no doubt pay a hefty price. As reported by WALB:

An Albany car dealership has a big mess to clean up. Thanksgiving night a man broke in to the Five Star Nissan showroom, stole a vehicle, and shattered glass windows as he drove right out the building.

You already know how he was caught.

He ran out of gas in Early County though [and was hanging out by the car!] and is now in police custody.

To read more (a fair amount) click here.

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It’s unclear what it will take for this Maine woman to understand that “911” is for emergencies. Check out the series of events, as reported by The Bangor Daily News:

Shirley Isacson, 66, “placed 10 calls to 911 in just over an hour” Friday, he said. “She was not reporting any type of emergency.”

The calls started at around 4:15 p.m. Friday and after being warned several times to stop calling for help if she did not need it, Isacson was given a ticket charging her with misuse of the emergency 911 system.

Lesson learned? Nope.

At around 10:30 p.m. Sunday, Belfast Police Department officials called Old Town to say they had received a call from Isacson’s number and the woman wasn’t making sense. While en route to her home, Old Town police got a second call from Maine State Police barracks in Orono saying they received a similar call.

You are not going to believe who Ms. Isacson called when the police knocked on her door.

… Isacson called 911 to say police were at the door harassing her …

Nooooo! This time she was just given a warning. Surely that’s it. Nope.

An hour later she called the non-emergency number for the Old Town Police Department and when police arrived …

Wait for it …

… she called 911 to say police were again at the door harassing her.

If you’re wondering when this ends – not yet!

In fact when police told her she was under arrest, “she tried to call 911 again,” Casey said.

Isacson was arrested and charged with misuse of the emergency 911 system and taken to Penobscot County Jail in Bangor, where she remained Monday night, a jail official said.

The Juice is exhausted. Here’s the source.

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As Police Cmdr. Kelly McMillin said: “you couldn t make up something stranger than this.” So here’s what happened, per knbc.com. Old Edward Bishop went and stole himself a pickup truck. Not so exciting, but …

…while [Mr. Bishop was] sitting outside a convenience store, a man with a gun hopped in and ordered him to start driving.

The car thief got jacked! Problem was, nobody looked at the fuel gauge.

The pickup ran out of gas and the gunman ordered Bishop to get out and push, but Bishop ran away and called police.

Now both Mr. Bishop and jacker Jomo Sexton are in the pokey.

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Really? You’re going to use a taser (in the back!) on a guy who posed NO THREAT to anyone? Have you read the manual? Even used properly, people die, Jack. Think about it.

For more taser posts, scroll down a bit, and enter “taser” in the “Search This Blog” box.

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Have you ever heard of squirrels invading a person’s home? Apparently this has been a major problem for a man in Parsippany for 17 years! It has been so bad that Mr. Slaughter (yes, that’s his real name) caught over 50 squirrels in recent years and released them several miles away. How bad was the squirrel problem? Per The Star-Ledger:

Slaughter said yesterday he had been trying to keep squirrels off his property for 17 years, catching them with the trap and then releasing them a few miles away in a wooded area.

During that time, he said, the animals broke into his home and were responsible for foul odors, and they destroyed the wooden edges on his roof.

So why is Mr. Slaughter in hot water?

[Mr. Slaughter] forgot to remove the trap two weekends ago as he went out of town to celebrate his birthday and the Easter weekend, resulting in a squirrel starving to death in the cage. It remained there for at least four days, he said.

Unfortunate, but criminal?

[Mr.] Slaughter, 52, has been charged with needlessly killing an animal and not providing food, water or protection to an animal, police said.

Said Mr. Slaughter:

“I just stupidly left the thing out.”

The Juice would let it go at that. (Please, PETA members, no emails! It was an accident!)

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