What lengths would you go to in order to avoid a speeding ticket? Ladies, would you fire up the waterworks? Gents, would you throw yourself on the mercy of the officer? You won’t believe what this guy did. As reported by WFTV.com:
A man is accused of calling 911 to say that a murder was about to take place, but West Melbourne authorities said the caller was just trying to get out of a traffic stop.
Yes, you read that correctly.
Okay, so technically it was July 5th, but clearly the drunkeness of these folks relates back (legal term, sorry) to July 4th. It seemed plausible when The Juice recently read that there are A LOT of drunk drivers out on July 4th. Let’s hope that, percentage-wise, this case is not a good sample. As reported by wsbtv.com:
A crash involving seven cars shut down Interstate 75 southbound in Clayton County for six hours. The crash happened on I-75 near CW Grant Parkway around 3 a.m. Friday. Clayton County police said a pedestrian in the road was struck by a car, and there was a domino effect.
Yikes. So where does the drinking come in?
New Hampshire Federal Judge James R. Muirhead was not amused (okay, he was really amused) when prisoner Charles Wolff included a hard-boiled egg with his request for a better diet. Here is what the Judge had to say, in an Order issued about the filing of the egg:
No fan I am
Of the egg at hand.
Certainly domestic life often presents challenging situations. But this? As reported by BeeNews.com (New York):
Police responded to a North Seine Drive residence where a male and female were having an argument about how the pizza had been sliced.
Really?
As a parent, you want to make sure your kids can handle themselves when they are on their own. This is not how you do it. As reported by swflcrimestoppers.org:
Southwest FloridaCrime Stoppers is asking for the public’s help identifying two women who utilized the innocence of several young children to commit a felony crime earlier this week.
According to deputies, two adult females, and five young children, entered the Gymboree store at 20350 Summerlin Road, Fort Myers, on Tuesday evening, July 23, to go shopping. When they approached the check out counter, another female was there speaking with one of the employees. When the suspect became engaged in that conversation, one of the children swiped the victims wallet, which was left on the counter. Once the stolen wallet was in hand, the troupe quickly exited the store and left in a white colored vehicle. The victim’s phone was also taken, but was found shortly thereafter along the roadside near Tanger Outlets.
“Down on the floor!” – or something like that – said the knife-wielding, would-be robber of the Cigarette Outlet in Des Moines, Iowa. Although employee #1 complied, #2 (Ruth Wright) didn’t, and grabbed a couple cans of chewing tobacco. Per the Des Moines Register:
Wright threw two cans of chewing tobacco at the man, one of which bounced off his face. A customer tackled the robber, but the robber broke off and ran out the door. Wright then called the store’s manager, who contacted police.
The almost robber? Old Mr. Wrong, “still wearing his black mask and a jacket, fled west on foot.”
This story reminds The Juice of the time he was in a bank years ago and he happened to overhear a conversation between a disgruntled account holder and the manager. “They cleaned out my account” she said. “They said I won the lottery, and they needed my account number to wire the proceeds. How could you let them do this?” Yes, she was trying to blame the bank. The manager asked her if she had played the lottery. When she replied that she hadn’t, the manager asked “Then how did you think you could have won it?” Bam! Manager of the Year! Here’s a somewhat similar, though much less egregious, story as reported by brooklynpaper.com:
68th Precinct – Bay Ridge—Dyker Heights
A scammer bilked an 80th Street woman out of $1,500 over the phone between Oct. 21 and Oct. 30, police state. The victim said she got the first call at 10:45 am at her home between 11th and 12th avenues, informing her that she had won the lottery and needed to send a $1,500 deposit to receive the prize. After getting several more calls during the next week, the woman decided to send the dough in the form of three $500 gift cards. She got a check for $3,950, but when she went to cash it at 11:20 am, it bounced.
This guy must have played Grand Theft Auto, because what he did could have come straight out of the game. As reported by kaj18.c0m (Montana):
The day-long crime spree happened on May 23, 2013.
And what a day it was.
When a drug deal goes south, doesn’t everyone head to the police station? Well, that depends. In this case, it sure looks like the right call. Per the website of The City of Tampa, Florida:
Milton Coley and Louis Xavier Ruiz-Machado arranged to meet at 109th Avenue and Lantana Avenue to conduct a drug deal around 12:40pm on 1/11/13. Coley walked up to Ruiz-Machado who was driving a 2003 Dodge Ram pick-up truck. Ruiz-Machado handed over the marijuana, but Coley refused to pay. Ruiz-Machado fired a shot and Coley fled on foot. He then called a friend to pick him up. As Coley got into his friend’s Nissan Altima in the 2200 block of Bougainvillea Avenue, Ruiz-Machado began chasing them in his pick-up truck. The friend feared for his safety and drove to the Tampa Police Department’s District 2 Office for help.
The pick-up truck chased them twice through the parking lot at a high rate of speed. Ruiz-Machado fired at least one shot and then fled as officers exited the district office with guns drawn. A short time later, officers boxed in Ruiz-Machado on the University of South Florida campus at Bull Run Drive and Elm Drive. USF Police, Florida Highway Patrol and the Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office helped detain the suspect. They recovered a 9 mm inside the vehicle. At District 2, witnesses saw Coley throw two large baggies with 59 grams of marijuana into the parking lot. He was charged with possession of marijuana. His friend who was driving did not face charges. Officers recovered one 9 mm shell casing in the parking lot.
OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA
Getting pocket dialed is annoying, though we all get tagged occasionally, even the police. In this particular instance, The Juice is guessing they weren’t the least bit annoyed.
Police responded to a 911 call in the 600 block of S.W. 122nd street. The caller was on a cell phone and accidentally dialed 911. When no one responded on the line, the dispatcher became concerned. They were able to trace the call and locate the cell phone in an abandoned house. Officers arrived and found three subjects had broken in to a rear door of the home and were inside illegally.
Legal Juice