Articles Posted in Best Of

Squeezed on:

pregnant%20woman%20lady.png

These women knew that they were virtually untouchable by the police. Why? Because they were pregnant (or suckling)! Per the Qianjiang Evening News (via ChinaDaily):

A group of 46 pregnant women were arrested and prosecuted for theft in Hangzhou, Zhejiang province.

The women, who committed more than 400 thefts a month in the city, vary in ages from 20 to 40. They repeatedly got pregnant, because police will not usually arrest pregnant women or women suckling. One member in the group even got pregnant eight times in 10 years.

After they were arrested, the number of robberies in the city decreased noticeably.

If you know of a stranger gang, The Juice is all ears.

Posted in:
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

bag%20flying%20in%20air%20fly.jpg

So this woman was walking her dog in Belmont, Massachusetts when, according to her, a car came speeding by. What did she do? As reported in the Belmont Citizen-Herald:

According to a police report, an officer on Oct. 1 met with a Belmont man who stated he was driving down Stone Road the previous morning when an object came through his open window and hit him in the face. He soon realized the projectile was “a flying bag of dog feces that splattered across his face, and the remaining matter soiled the front of the car,” the report said.

The Juice’s first thought: Helluva shot! Second thought: If the car is going so fast, how does she pull that off? Backstory:

The day before, on Sept. 30, an officer was dispatched to Stone Road to take a report from a woman about a speeding complaint. The woman reported she was walking her dog down Stone Road and threw a bag at a dark-colored sedan that was allegedly speeding down Stone Road, almost hitting a person on a bicycle.

The woman told police she ran to hid in a neighboring yard after throwing the bag, which she admitted was filled with feces, because the vehicle remained in the area.

The charges?

… assault and battery with a dangerous weapon, vandalism to property and disorderly conduct …

Yes, a “dangerous weapon” … Click here to read more.

Posted in:
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZ0fq0BKvNk

He did! Listen to the 911 call [above]. So what happened after the call? As reported by The Hartford Courant:

Dispatchers traced the call to 192 Waterville Road, the home of Robert J. Michelson.

He told narcotics officers who visited his home that he had spent a lot of money online buying everything he needed to grow marijuana. He had one small plant at home, along with seeds and equipment for growing, police said.

Michelson also had drug paraphernalia for personal use.

If this was an attempted candor pander, it failed.

He was charged with possession of drug paraphernalia, illegal cultivation of marijuana, possession of a controlled substance and possession of drug paraphernalia in a drug factory.

Michelson was brought to Farmington police headquarters where he was released on $5,000 bond. Police said he was cooperative with officers, but made an obscene gesture at the dispatchers.

Yeah, it was all the dispatcher’s fault. Here’s the source.

marijuana%20pot%20cannabis%20mary%20jane%20field%20big%20crop.jpg

Posted in:
Squeezed on:
Updated:
Squeezed on:

gun%20pointed%20at%20you%20in%20your%20face%20aim%20aimed%20pistol%20handgun.jpg

THEY TRIED TO ROB A GUN STORE – WITH AN OPENLY-ARMED EMPLOYEE. Who does that? And the kicker? These gents lost $40 in the process. As reported The Kansas City Star:

It all started about 2 p.m. when one of the robbers came into Guns Unlimited, 8113 N. Oak Trafficway, and asked for a box of .357 Magnum ammunition. The clerk told him it would cost about $50. The man, who looked to be in his 20s, said he needed to get more money and left.

Note that the clerk told him the cost would be “about $50.” So what does the dude do? He comes back with $40!

Just before 5 p.m., he returned with a partner and said he wanted to buy the ammunition. The clerk looked at his identification to check his age, rang up the sale and told the man he owed $50.19. The man slid two $20 bills onto the counter.

“You’re $10.19 short,” the clerk said.

The man pulled a blue .357 revolver with a 4-inch barrel from his waistband, pointed it at the clerk and said, “Give me your money!”

If you’re wondering how this ends with the robbers out $40 ….

[The clerk] zeroed in on the robber’s cylinder and saw it was empty as he reached for his own gun and pulled it from its holster.

Advantage, clerk.

“His eyes got as big as two dinner plates,” the clerk said. “Before I got mine pointed at him, he ran to the door at, like, 95 mph. I’m surprised he didn’t bust the glass out of the door.”

The clerk, who had started to squeeze his trigger, relaxed his finger as the robbers fled, leaving behind the two $20 bills.

And the would-be robbers? “[They] were last seen running south.”

Squeezed on:

no%20pain%20sign%20painfree%20free.jpg

“Shock” can mask a lot of things, but this? Per The Sun …

A mugging victim had a six inch knife plunged deep into her back — and she didn’t even feel it.

Skeptical? Check out the picture here.

Incredibly the 22-year-old, who was knifed by a mugger on her way home from work, failed to notice the appalling injury and managed to calmly stroll to safety.

The office worker had grappled with her attacker when he snatched her handbag as she walked to her parents’ house in the Russian capital Moscow.

But she was so shocked by the ordeal she didn’t know that the thug had buried a kitchen knife in her neck just fractions of an inch from her spinal cord.

When she got home her horrified parents rushed her to hospital where surgeons managed to remove the blade without damaging Julia’s spine.

Crazy.

Squeezed on:

pennies%20penny%20lots%20pile.jpg

The much maligned and often stepped over penny took another hit in Utah. As reported by The Deseret News (Salt Lake City):

On May 27, Jason West went to Basin Clinic prepared to dispute an outstanding bill, according to Assistant Vernal Police Chief Keith Campbell. West, 38, apparently did not believe he owed the clinic the $25 it said he did.

“After asking if they accepted cash, West dumped 2,500 pennies onto the counter and demanded that they count it,” Campbell said. “The pennies were strewn about the counter and the floor.”

The incident upset clinic staff, said Campbell, adding that West’s behavior served “no legitimate purpose.”

Clinic staff told West they were calling police and he left the office. Officers caught up with West later and issued him a citation for disorderly conduct, an infraction, which carries a potential fine of $140.

Seems like a huge waste of time to The Juice. Here’s the source, which has a link to an interview with Mr. West.

Squeezed on:

time-bomb-explosive-tnt-dynamite-thumb

Although it’s dangerous to handle explosives for a living, a lot of these folks would probably prefer dealing with bombs than having to do what South Lake Tahoe, California Explosive Ordinance Team members recently did. What was that? Just remember that this is posted in the “Gross” category. As reported in the Tahoe Daily Tribune:

The incident began about 4:30 a.m. when a California Highway Patrol officer contacted Steven Ferrini, 60, in a “No Parking” zone on Highway 89 near Luther Pass, to a CHP report.

The officer arrested the man after allegedly finding what was believed to be methamphetamine.

During a subsequent search, officers found “a suspicious wire, with an on/off switch” in the man’s front left pocket leading to his anal cavity, to the report.

Uh oh.

Officers planned to have the device removed by medical personnel at Barton Memorial Hospital, but during an interview with the man at the CHP office, “the subject began to explain his knowledge of explosives and bomb-making,” according to the report.

Red alert!

The man’s statements caused officers to become suspicious. They contacted the El Dorado County Explosive Ordinance Disposal Team and evacuated the office around 5:45 a.m.

Try to imagine how that call went. “Um, bomb squad, there may be a bomb in this guy’s … Can you send some people over?”

About 9 a.m., “the EOD team rendered the device safe and determined it was not an explosive device. The vibrator was subsequently removed and placed into property,” according to the report.

The man was booked into El Dorado County Jail in South Lake Tahoe on suspicion of possession of a controlled substance.

Squeezed on:

five%20dollar%20bill%205%20lincoln.jpg

Who do you think would be the last group of folks to tell the government that they are subversives? Maybe subversives? Well sir, the legislature in South Carolina was of a different mind, because they enacted the “Subversive Activities Registration Act.” Honestly. Per the act:

For the purposes of this chapter the following words, phrases and terms are defined as follows:

(1) “Subversive organization” means every corporation, society, association, camp, group, bund, political party, assembly, body or organization, composed of two or more persons, which directly or indirectly advocates, advises, teaches or practices the duty, necessity or propriety of controlling, conducting, seizing or overthrowing the government of the United States, of this State or of any political subdivision thereof by force or violence or other unlawful means;

So what’s a subversive organization in South Carolina to do?

SECTION 23-29-60. Registration of members of subversive and foreign-controlled organizations.

Every member of a subversive organization, or an organization subject to foreign control, every foreign agent and every person who advocates, teaches, advises or practices the duty, necessity or propriety of controlling, conducting, seizing or overthrowing the government of the United States, of this State or of any political subdivision thereof by force or violence or other unlawful means, who resides, transacts any business or attempts to influence political action in this State, shall register with the Secretary of State on the forms and at the times prescribed by him.

Exactly how does a subversive organization register? Since you asked …

SECTION 23-29-70. Forms and schedule for filing information.

Every organization or person coming within the provisions of this chapter shall file with the Secretary of State all information which he may request, on the forms and at the times he may prescribe.

And yes, there is a form for that. Oh, and that’ll be $5.00 please. By the way, though the registration fee may be small, the penalty for failure to do so can be quite severe.

Any organization or person who violates any of the provisions of this chapter shall, upon conviction thereof, be punished by a fine of not more than twenty-five thousand dollars or imprisonment for not more than ten years, or by both fine and imprisonment.

Squeezed on:

marijuana%20pot%20cannabis%20mary%20jane%20field%20big%20crop.jpg

Sure, there’s an old saw about “hiding in plain sight.” But really, does it sound like a good idea to grow marijuana on school property? And if you’re going to throw out there that it was in “a wooded area,” you probably think that “hiding in plain sight” is actually a good idea. As reported by News4Jax.com:

A homeless man was arrested Monday after a school resource officer at Lake City Middle School [Florida] found several marijuana plants growing in a wooded area on school property, Columbia County deputies said.

Detectives said they were able to use surveillance of the area to find 33-year-old Damon Crosby caring for the plants.

Crosby was arrested while taking care of the plants Monday and was booked into the Columbia County Detention Facility with bail set at $16,000.

The nine marijuana plants ranged from 1 foot to 2.5 feet in height. The estimated value of the plants is more than $5,000.

The charges?

… cultivation of marijuana, possession of drug paraphernalia and trespassing on school grounds.

Squeezed on:

mercury.png
So this guy’s estranged wife visited him regularly. How did he repay her kindness? He put mercury in her tea! At least five times! Why? So that when she got sick, he could take care of her, and win her back. How much jail time do you get for something like this? Zippy. Nada. Zilch. Squadoosh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There are mitigating factors. But still, not a single day in jail? To read the entire story at Metro.co.uk, and to see a video report, click here.