Articles Posted in Best Of

If this case is at all typical, it’s very tough for a doctor in the UK to be permanently barred from practicing medicine. As reported by The Daily Express:

Dr Ellen MacInnes, who has also been banned from driving three times, had to provide a blood sample to prove she was fit to get back behind the wheel, a disciplinary hearing heard.

… However the doctor, of Chelmsford, Essex, abused her position of trust and lied to one of her patients by inventing an illness and claiming she needed to take a sample of their blood. She also forged the signature of a fellow ­doctor.

Before you go calling the police about that giant schlong on your driveway, perhaps it’s worth determining if it’s paint or … A homeowner in Millville, New Jersey skipped that step, and called Johnny Law, unnecessarily, as reported by The News of Cumberland County.

Someone graced an East Vine Street driveway with a drawing of a penis early Monday morning or before.

The person who called police reported that someone had spray painted the phalus, but police on scene discovered it was chalk. They advised the property owner to wash it off with water and reported no actual property damage.

Doesn’t everyone like colorful birds? Well, if you’re in Center Line, Michigan, and want to make your drab bird a little more colorful – don’t. Why? In addition to the obvious reasons (so please, PETA, no more emails) because of this law:

Sec. 10-4. Artificially coloring birds.

It shall be unlawful for any person to artificially color, spray or paint any bird or fowl or to sell, offer for sale, or otherwise dispose of any such colored bird or fowl.

Dude. Of all people to stalk, the police? That’s what Thomas C. Massey of Traverse City, Michigan is accused of, per the Traverse City Record-Eagle:

Massey spent a good portion of Monday shouting at officers and making a profane gesture at them as he paced around the building, police said.

It wasn’t an isolated incident. Police contend Massey heckled and harassed local officers since at least March, and he’s often spotted around the law enforcement center.

The “Brown ‘N Serve” sausages were 98 cents in the aisle, but rang up at $1.00. When it happened the second time, consumer activist Mary Bach resorted to a familiar remedy – court. Wal-Mart said the overcharge was a mistake. What did the judge say? Per The Tribune-Review:

Murrysville District Judge Charles Conway sided with Bach in her civil lawsuit alleging unfair trade practices. He awarded Bach $100 in damages, plus about $80 in court costs.

Said a victorious Bach:

So maybe it’s not 100% certain that he was drinking with the monkeys, but he let them out of their cages, he was drunk, and … as reported by The August Chronicle (Georgia):

According to a GHSU Police Bureau incident report, a co-worker discovered Coley Mitchell, 32, partially unclothed in the Laboratory Animal Services technician locker room at the Sanders Research and Education Building about 10:30 p.m. Monday.

Yikes!

Everyone craves some type of food at one time or another. And although you may not consider Cheez-Its to be food, a New Hampshire man had a serious craving, and apparently no cash. So, according to The New Hampshire Union Leader …

Officer Jacob Tyler was on patrol when he stopped to check on the business. When he pulled up, the clerk came out to tell him he had just been punched in the face. The officer noted redness around the clerk’s eye.

The clerk told Tyler he saw a man go out the door after hiding a three-ounce bag of Cheez-It in his pants. The clerk confronted him outside, the two got into a struggle, and the shoplifter punched him in the face and then ran off.

Can you believe that a sexual harassment claim could arise from a cocktail waitress’s employment at a strip club? Well, suspend your disbelief, and take my word for it. Or click here to read about it in the Gothamist.

Anyway, that’s not the point of the post. The point of the post is the caption of the Complaint:

LOURDES GARCIA, on behalf of herself and hose similarly situated, PLAINTIFFS [emphasis added]